Beleaguered Dell suit claims Apple’s ‘shiny’ iPad not fit for business

“Dell Australia managing director Joe Kremer has refused to give up the tablet computing race, claiming ‘shiny’ devices like Apple’s iPad are too difficult for business to support,” Brian Corrigan reports for The Australian Financial Review. “Apple has had great success getting its tablet computer into the hands of senior executives and board members since launching the iPad two years ago.”

Corrigan reports, “Referring to the iPad, Mr Kremer told a media and analyst briefing in Sydney on Wednesday afternoon: ‘People might be attracted to some of these shiny devices but technology departments can’t afford to support them. If you are giving a presentation and something fails on the software side it might take four days to get it up and running again. I don’t think this race has been run yet.'”

Corrigan reports, “While he would not be drawn on the likely uptake of Windows 8 among the business community when it is launched later this year, Mr Kremer said there was significant pent-up demand among customers that had skipped the previous two releases of the software and were still running their computers on Windows XP.”

Read more in the full article here.

MacDailyNews Take: The poor bastard has an absolutely awful job, so we’ll go easy on him: It’s no wonder that he’s already resorting to blatant lies about iPad when he doesn’t even have a product to offer in its place and when Apple could buy his puny, shrinking, failing company in cash, shut it down and give the money back to the shareholders, and barely even notice the expenditure, if they noticed it at all. It must suck to only be good enough to have to work at a place where the founder returned to the helm only to lead them deeper into the depths of the proverbial shitter.

From the sound of it, this particular Dell dude could be submerged in a vat of Sodium Pentothal and he’d claim he was on a desert hike. In other words: A liar; aka the perfect Dell employee.

That said, below are some articles about iPad in the enterprise and other Dell-related topics that may be of interest.

[Thanks to MacDailyNews Reader “Dan K.” for the heads up.]

Related articles:
Report: 6 of top 10 enterprise devices using Good Technology are iOS, 97% of tablets are iPad – April 26, 2012
Barclays survey shows iPad well-positioned to dominate enterprise tablet computing – April 12, 2012
Apple iPad in the enterprise: A videoconferencing dream machine – April 10, 2012
Small business iPad use quadrupled in past year – March 6, 2012
Needham: Apple iPad to grow in business like hybrid corn – February 9, 2012
Forrester: Apple gear used by 1 in 5 workers; Apple will ‘end Windows’ dominance – January 26, 2012
Analyst: Apple enterprise sales of Macs, iPads to surge 58% this year – January 10, 2012
SAP giving employees 1,000 iPads a month, expects to 20,000 units in employees hands by year end – January 10, 2012
United Continental pilots get 11,000 Apple iPads – August 23, 2011

Beleaguered Dell blames Apple, weak demand for putrid Q1 results, dismal outlook – May 23, 2012
Beleaguered Dell drops nearly 10% as quarterly results miss expectations; profit plunges 33%; weak guidance – May 22, 2012
Dell shares fall on earnings miss, weaker than expected outlook – February 21, 2012
More blood on Apple iPad’s touchscreen: Dell kills Streak 7, backs out of Android tablets in US – December 5, 2011

Dvorak: Windows 8 an unmitigated disaster; unusable and annoying; it makes your teeth itch – June 3, 2012
Apple’s new iPad could dramatically alter the Windows PC upgrade cycle – March 8, 2012
The Guardian: Microsoft’s Windows 8 is confusing as hell; an appalling user experience – March 5, 2012
The 9 versions of Windows 8 show one of the key differences between Microsoft and Apple – March 2, 2012
Windows 8 tablet vs. Apple iPad running iOS 5: feature by feature (with video) – March 1, 2012
Needham: Apple Mac growth to continue six-year run of outpacing Windows PCs – February 28, 2012
Tim Cook: Apple the only company innovating in personal computers, and have been for some time – February 24, 2012
More good news for Apple: Microsoft previews Windows 8 (with video) – June 1, 2011

Apple now worth 25 times Dell’s market value – June 4, 2012
Apple now worth 24 times Dell’s market value – May 23, 2012
Apple now worth 23 times Dell’s market value – May 23, 2012
Apple now worth 22 times Dell’s market value – May 23, 2012
Apple now worth twenty times Dell’s market value – April 3, 2012
Apple now worth nineteen times Dell’s market value – March 26, 2012
Apple now worth eighteen times Dell’s market value – March 19, 2012
Apple now worth seventeen times Dell’s market value – March 12, 2012
Apple now worth sixeen times Dell’s market value – February 29, 2012
Apple now worth fifteen times Dell’s market value – February 15, 2012
Apple now worth fourteen times Dell’s market value – September 20, 2011
Apple now worth thirteen times Dell’s market value – August 26, 2011
Apple now worth twelve times Dell’s market value – January 27, 2011
Apple now worth eleven times Dell’s market value – September 23, 2010
Apple now worth ten times Dell’s market value – September 09, 2010
Apple now worth nine times Dell’s market value – June 01, 2010
Apple now worth eight times Dell’s market value – May 21, 2010
Apple now worth seven times Dell’s market value – January 26, 2010
Apple now worth sextuple Dell’s market value – October 20, 2009
Apple now worth quintuple Dell’s market value – February 12, 2009
Apple could buy Dell outright; Mac-maker has more cash on hand than Dell is worth – October 21, 2008
Apple now worth quadruple Dell’s market value – May 01, 2008
Apple now worth triple Dell’s market value – December 06, 2007
Apple now worth double Dell’s market value – July 27, 2007
Beleaguered Dell: Shut it down and give the money back to the shareholders – March 02, 2007
Biting words on Apple come back to haunt Dell – February 10, 2007
Steve Jobs emails Apple team: Michael Dell not the best prognosticator, Apple worth more than Dell – January 16, 2006
Apple now worth more than Dell – January 13, 2006

44 Comments

  1. Four days?! Maybe for a blathering idiot with a single digit IQ….

    If an app crashes mid presentation, It takes me 5 seconds:

    1. Open the app tray with 5 finger gesture
    2. Close app
    3. Relaunch app
    4. continue presentation

    Worst case scenario, it takes a minute as I restart the iPad. But that’s NEVER happened.

    Mr. Kramer… Kindly shove your head further up your own @$$ if you can. It will help you when you have nightmares about losing your own job.

      1. Hahaha how does the MSCE certificate work? Does it bestow the single digit IQ upon its recipient or must one have a single digit IQ to receive it?

  2. Really? Lets look at what real expert on business was doing in 2010:

    SAP To Deploy Up To 17,000 iPads In 12 Months

    With SAP Business ByDesign, you can run practically your whole business on post pc devices.

    The iPad represents a corporate sea change that dell is drowning in.

  3. Wow. “If you are giving a presentation and something fails on the software side it might take four days to get it up and running again.” Really, “4 days”! Does it take 4 days to fly his grandchild in? My 3 year old grand daughter can’t read and she has never had her iPad down even for 4 minutes. She turns 4 on Friday. But, I think she is still to young to work as an IT consultant for Dell.

    What color Kool-Aid are they drinking at Dell these days?

    1. “She turns 4 on Friday. But, I think she is still to young to work as an IT consultant for Dell.”

      Maybe too young, but definitely overqualified for Dell.

  4. “If you are giving a presentation and something fails on the software side it might take four days to get it up and running again.”

    Apple and Microsoft have given myriad new product introductions over the years. Which one was more likely to include an “Oops! That’s not supposed to happen.”?

  5. He right, if it crashes it can be a real pain in the ass. That’s why it’s silly to ever use a PC/Android when iOS/OSX is an option.

    Is this idiot actually pretending that Windows is the most stable OS?

  6. Funny how these bozos fall over themselves to give us memorable quotes…
    ‘they’re not just going to walk straight in…’
    ‘amateur hour…’
    And now
    ‘not fit for business’
    Hilarious

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