Florida man demands right to wed his porn-laden Apple MacBook

“Chris Sevier, a man from Florida, believes he should be allowed to wed his Macbook,” David Millward reports for The Telegraph. “Mr Sevier argues that if gays should be allowed to marry, then so should other sexual minorities.”

“Mr Sevier states he has fallen in love with a pornography laden computer,” Millward reports. “‘Over time, I began preferring sex with my computer over sex with real women,’ he told a court in Florida. This appears to be not a passing holiday romance, but a lifelong commitment. If gays have the right to ‘marry their object of sexual desire, even if they lack corresponding sexual parts, then I should have the right to marry my preferred sexual object,’ he said. Mr Sevier, who describes himself as ‘a former judge advocate and combat veteran,’ is persistent, filing claims not only in Florida but also Utah.”

“If gays feel as is they are second class citizens, Mr Sevier argues then ‘those of us in the real minority, who want to marry machines and animals, certainly feel like third class citizens,'” Millward reports. “Mr Sevier apparently sought a marriage licence for himself and his ‘machine spouse,’ but for some reason was denied. ‘The exclusion from marriage to a machine denies myself a dignity and status of immense import,’ he argues in his motion.”

Read more in the full article here.

MacDailyNews Take: Unconscious coupling.

If the name Chris Sevier rings a bell, it’s because he’s the sane, oops, typo… same gentleman who sued Apple last year because its devices can display porn.

God Bless America.

[Thanks to MacDailyNews readers far, far too numerous to mention individually for the heads up.]

Related article:
Apple sued because its devices can display porn – July 12, 2013

84 Comments

  1. This is a farce… He’s using gay marriage as a proxy for his own fantasy. The reality is, that marriage is not about sex. Marriage is about coupling, interdependence and growing old together. About sharing care and love and commonality, without necessarily having to share common interests. It’s about financial stability and companionship.

    His fantasy is more or less a one way street. He’s molesting his computer and his computer can’t love back or take care of him. So in some instances he could be breaking the law in abusing his authority over his computer for his own personal gratification. However since computers have no mind or soul, no self identity, etc, it hardly makes a difference what he does with it.

    He can’t marry it. He can’t claim it as a dependent.

      1. Procreation an important factor, but the Bible documents many other factors for marriage, not to mention following the laws of the land, which can and do change over time. Today the definition has been expanded to include more. But I hope never ever include anything other than a consenting adult human being. Right now we have almost 300 girls in Nigeria, being sold and forced into slavery and unconsented marriage. Just horrible.

  2. At least he found a computer that can handle the modern porn sites.

    A Windows machine would become so once Ted with viruses he’d need a life insurance policy on his new bride.

  3. If he drops his Macbook, is he guilty of abuse? If he drains the Macbook battery power to zero is he guilty of starvation and neglect? If the Macbook does not give consent to have sexual relations, is he guilty of rape? If he looks at porn on another computer, is he guilty of adultery?

  4. He is just a tad ahead of himself here. They are making all kinds of strides in personal robots. It won’t be long till they have female ones in the home, they can marry. Then he can take it to court.

  5. I’m not sure what the problem is. No reason this person shouldn’t have the same right as gays, lesbians, animal lovers, and everyone else who has seen fit to redefine the institution of marriage.

  6. On the plus side, you don’t see anyone asking to marry their PC, even if it is porn loaded. If you marry a PC, you end up marrying the whole family of what’s installed itself inside it off all his porn sites.

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