“The world’s richest man Bill Gates is considering a possible flight into space, a Russian cosmonaut said from International Space Station Wednesday, citing Gates’ colleague, current space tourist Charles Simonyi,” AFP reports.
“‘Charles said that Bill Gates is also preparing to visit space,’ cosmonaut Fyodor Yurchikhin told journalists during a video link-up from the space station, broadcast on state television Rossiya,” AFP reports.
AFP reports, “Simonyi, who made his fortune at Microsoft, is the fifth tourist to travel to the ISS, following the United States’ Dennis Tito in 2001 and Greg Olsen in 2005, South Africa’s Mark Shuttleworth in 2002, and a US citizen of Iranian origin, Anousheh Ansari in 2006. Space Adventures plans to expand its offerings next year to include a 100-million-dollar trip around the moon…”
Full article here.
One way, please — and take Ballmer with you, if they make rockets big enough. Now Billy can put his money where his mouth is and make sure that the onboard life support systems are run by Windows Vista. That’d give new meaning to “hasta la Vista, baby,” huh?
On second thought, leave Uncle Fester here. Someone’s gotta stay to go down with the Microsoftanic.
It’s actually going to be a peacekeeping mission. We’re shipping him off into interplanetary space where he’s fair game. The aliens said it was either that, or they blow up earth for creating Windows ME, Vista, 2k, 95, 98, 3.1, well just plain Windows in general, and the Zune as well as Microsoft Bob. So really, he’s a philanthropist after all.
Gates will stare long and hard at the Earth from an ISS portal.
And just before climaxing, he’ll croak, “IT’S ALL MINE! HAHAHAHAHAHA! ! !”
Be afraid.
One way ticket
Letter to Bill Gates,
Dear Mr. Gates, I read your considering a trip in space aboard our faboulus Russian space rocket.
I write to you to please don’t even consider such a thing.
Our rockets are not powered by your software, but our national spam botnet based economy is.
If a accident occurs and the rocket lands in Redmond Washington USA, it will wipe out all life there.
This would be terrible for us.
Thank you.
PharaMaster
(big time Russian botnet herder)
Hmmm maybe this is just a big commie conspiracy—they plan to get the world’s richest thief and give him due
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Funniest thread at MDN. Ever. Starting from the story itself with that pic.
It’s one-upsmanship to the nth degree. Jobs will be hoping for disaster so bad he’d convert to whatever he isn’t now. If Gates goes through with the stunt, Jobs would be crushed. Doing it himself would only be “me too,” even if he tries to get the jump on Gates. And if he did do it first, it might be a plot by Gates.
The only thing that could possibly be on the same scale would be Jobs running for president of the U.S. and winning.
Without a word in the story changing, the headline should read: Jobs to Run for President.
In space no one can hear your zune… apparently the same goes on earth too!
The capsule crash lands on the moon. Gates and Ballmer busily try to reboot the launch computers, but all they get are sad-looking Macs on the computer terminals.
Gates: What’s up with this? I thought we had sold the Russians Vista and all the while they’ve been using Mac System 9? Aaargh!
Steve Jobs (cracklin’ voice over the radio): Ah! Revenge is a dish best served cold, Bill.
Gates (shaking his fist at the heavens): Joooooooooooooobs! (the name echos into the ether).
Soyuz: “Houston, we have your problem here”
They are worrying about space debris… but Bill in space will just be more space junk…
Lost in Space staring Billy Mummy… Billy Gates! Who the hell will be Smith? Some bumbling idiot called Ballmer maybe?
This would be Bill’s only truly useful product launch…. getting Gates off the planet.
Mee-ga, Gatesa, bigga booma inna de koopadup capuscule. Inna da oramibitun! WEEEEEEEEEE! WEEEEEEEEE! Ohmamia! Go downandown! Go inna bigga BIGGA boom! CHAIR! CHAAAAAIR!
Maybe Bill’s looking for ways to return Monkeyboy Bulmer to The Planet of the Apes?
[the first words ever spoken by a human to the apes]
George Taylor (aka Gates): Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!
Maybe he can finally get a decent haircut in zero gravity. I wonder if he’ll piss on the bus tires continuing the Gagarin tradition?
One article I read said that Simonyi took an MP3 player up with him. It didn’t say if it was an iPod, Zune, or other. Anyone know which player he has?
DenisRS
true didn’t think of that. I’ve read a lot about Buran too, it ‘s kind of strange to think that the Russians had a shuttle also. I don’t beleive they had the life support systems working at the time of the flight. They built a couple more but i think they were damaged when a roof collapsed on them. It’s a shame, they sould be in a museum some where, so people could appreciate them.
priceless picture
To curious:
Re: mp3 player brand. I couldn’t find it. It might be undisclosed deliberately.
“I am bringing up a lot of camera equipment and a lot of blank tapes and cassettes,” said Simonyi, who has also brought an MP3 player with over 1,600 tracks loaded “all legally” with classical and rock music.”
You could ask him yourself at:
http://www.charlesinspace.com/
Ballmer would give a whole new meaning to the term, “black hole”.
@ MacDailyNews Take:
Now Billy can put his money where his mouth is and make sure that the onboard life support systems are run by Windows Vista. That’d give new meaning to “hasta la Vista, baby,” huh?
Last Will and Testament:
I, William Henry Gates III, give absolutely nothing to anyone or anything.
Gates might say: “I searched and I searched, Houston, but no one sent my money in a second rocket.”
@ Steve Ball-me-more
Mee-ga, Gatesa, bigga booma inna de koopadup capuscule. Inna da oramibitun! WEEEEEEEEEE! WEEEEEEEEE! Ohmamia! Go downandown! Go inna bigga BIGGA boom! CHAIR! CHAAAAAIR!
The monkey tries to speak.
Thank you for your support, and remember that Microsoft’s <a > flash-based Zune design</a> will include an extremely weak lightbulb as the main component.
Lemme try that link again:
Thank you for your support, and remember that Microsoft’s flash-based Zune design will include an extremely weak lightbulb as the main component.
Gates isn’t that bad a guy anymore. His soul crushing legacy has been passed on to Ballmer and now he mostly give money to Malaria patients. Besides, if Gates did leave, who would we pick on? …Sony? Ha-ha-ha *don’t waste my time.
Billy & Ballmy on a one way trip in space…..
The aliens will never forgive us!
Imagine Ballmer in an alien museum someplace, and featured in the Earth exhibit.
I’m embarrassed already…
Houston: Houston, to shuttle one. We are authorized to go with launch.
Gates: Oh, boy.
Houston: By the way, we just installed Vista on all our PCs in mission control.
Gates: Gulp.
[Insert sound of loud banging on shuttle door and screaming.]
rofl!
Put Billy G on a one way rocket headed into the Sun.
OK, Windows stinks and Bill Gates was largely responsible for it’s architectural mistakes and bullying PC makers into not using alternatives. He is a bad guy.
But why is there so much wishing him to die a violent death? Will this hatred bring more users to the Mac? The vile being spewed in this thread is a poor reflection on Mac users.