PC World writer’s advice for Microsoft: ‘Stop making crap’

PC World magazine’s Stephen Manes offers some parting advice for Bill Gates as he “transitions” out of Microsoft:

Quit kidding yourself. Do some soul-searching and publicly disown the longstanding public-relations fantasy that Microsoft has something to do with “innovation.” Your business has always been about taking others’ ideas and selling them with a Microsoft badge. Period. After CP/M came DOS; after Mac came Windows; after Palm came Pocket PC; after Netscape came IE. And those are just the most obvious examples.

Insist on quality and security. Microsoft ads say “Your potential. Our passion,” but the real motto should be “Do the Minimum.” Whenever I pick up a Microsoft product, I expect stupid or dysfunctional design. You rarely disappoint me.

Shake up the talent. Nobody in a position of authority at Microsoft ever seems to get fired. Many should be. How many times can a product jettison features and miss deadlines before its handlers get the boot? How many security flaws can pop up before their creators walk the plank?

Stop making crap. Software has to run, not crash, before it can fly.

Full article with more here.
So true, but Microsoft has little chance of actually executing any of Manes’ suggestions.

Related articles:
The Economist: Apple’s Steve Jobs is Bill Gates’ secret ‘Chief Software Architect’ replacement wish – June 22, 2006
Requiem for Bill Gates – June 16, 2006
Bill Gates to transition out of a day-to-day role in Microsoft – June 15, 2006

40 Comments

  1. I believe now more than ever that the era of Microsoft is over. They are moving only on inertia. Vista is going to fail, I mean really fail. I think Apple and OS X is primed and ready for a huge renaissance and resurgence. Apple needs to take the gloves off and go for the killer blow. Apple should start focusing on the enterprise. I still think many people buy PCs because they use them at work and people are creatures of habit. Even though the enterprise market is not that big or has limited growth potential, I still think Apple would sell many more iMacs if they were sitting on people’s desks at work.

  2. And this on PC World? Amazing. Almost to think people are starting to think by themselves. 1984 ?

    I like the quote: Embrace the idea that quality and security have to be built in, not tested in.

    Absofsckinglutely! So much Microsoft does not get it that even Gates said in an interview that Windows HAS to be the best security-wise in that with all the attacks Microsoft now knows a lot about security and with all the flaws exposed by cracker patched so far then Windows must be more secure than other OSes who had not their flaws exposed.

    Ridiculous

  3. stop writing crap!

    if Microsoft wasn’t great then why does EVERYONE (who is not a loooozar) buy their stuff?

    seriously anuybody who uses windows instead of just complaining about it likes it just fine.

    macs – noun – a solution in search of a problem that aint there!

  4. And where the Hell is “Mac Realist” today? Has the PC World cat got your tongue, “MR”? Or are you still in PE class and just haven’t read the latest slam on your beloved MonkeySoft?

    Gawd, but this has to hurt the all-too-wise “MR,” especially since he told us, one and all, that he was shorting the stock and rebuying at $47. Hmmm, where’s your Messiah NOW, “Mac Realist”? (Billy Crystal doing Edward G. Robinson.)

  5. Steve Ballmer’s Chair is right (now THAT is a funny sentence) – I notice that Stock Boy has picked up and left since the stock has been rising. Where is he now? I’ll tell you where I am now: I am invested even further into AAPL, and have made a ton of money on this stock. Eat shit and die, Stock Boy!!! Bwahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa..a..a..aaa!!!

  6. Notice how MS has to continually give its products away free (IE), or at a loss (Xbox) or strong arm its resellers (Windows OS) to actually get it into consumers hands? How long can a company stay viable with this type of business model?

  7. Jimbo, thanks so much for the memory refresher! I had completely forgotten about “Stock Boy” and his addled advice!

    I think that he and “Mac Realist” must be lying quietly under a rock somewhere licking their wounds right now. (I hope that’s ALL they’re licking!)

    And the news/stock price is going to get even worse (for them, that is) the closer we get to WWDC. The truth is that this gathering was scheduled to have taken place in June, but since the Mac community had to sit quietly an additional two months–with relatively little “leaking” of new information–the stock price dropped and a relative malaise descended upon us.

    However, that period has almost passed now, and the bandwagon has begun to roll once again. Hang on, “MR” and “SB”; it’s going to be a fast a furious ride!

  8. “if Microsoft wasn’t great then why does EVERYONE (who is not a loooozar) buy their stuff?”

    Because MS threaten PC makers to stop offerring other OS’s, such as IBM’s OS/2 in their boxes.

    Becasue MS threaten PC makers to only offer IE as the defualt web browser.

    Because MS as created a small world of certifications for their products that many individual and companies have spent a fortune on.

    Becasue MS applications don’t play nice with other software.

  9. Am I in a parallel universe? That’s an article I didn’t expect to see in a PC publication. Can’t argue with it however, it’s dead on. Either the author is trolling for attention or there is much more resentment towards MS and its products than I was aware of. Will this get picked up in the media? Doubt it, but it would be nice.

  10. Re: Triumph

    . . . telling Microsoft to stop making crap is like telling yours truly to stop humping…

    …your owners leg? stuffed animals? the pillows on the couch? all the garden gnomes in the neighborhood?

    or worse yet… Windows users?

  11. the pc losers just got belted with a crowbar to the teeth.

    must suck to be a pc user, esp with vista coming, thats going to be less usable and more insecure than xp.

    and now you have pc journo’s telling you like it is.

    suffer losers!!!

  12. JadisOne,

    You Mac users with your ironclad OS are so simplistic.

    We don’t just send the keystrokes back to Mother Russia, we also send backups to China simultaneously.

    Luckily for us most people use Windows and not Macs or we’d have to get real jobs.

  13. Stop selling crap? STOP SELLING CRAP?

    Are you all smoking? It is our most successful product. We have been selling crap to our customers and it brings back tons of $.

    Why on this world should we stop our most successful business model?

    We made selling crap a gold mine in Redmond.

    Sheeeeessh some people. Amazing people in PC World hadn’t get it.

    We sell crap and our customers love it. We just tell them it is the best they can get in IT world and they believe it.

    Uhmmmm, thinking about pee now… I am sure we will outsell champagne with our faithful customer base.

  14. Quit kidding yourself
    We are not kidding ourself. We innovated the way to innovate: buy others’ innovations than selling as Microsoft and keep doing it. In due time customers forget all about the disappeared buyout company and truly believes it is Microsoft who has introduced it. Works 100% with our customers: just ask any Windows user.

    Insist on quality and security
    We keep insisting saying that. Little by little people believe it: if we say it it means we must do it. Again, ask any Windows user. They even expect Vista to be the ultimate in security when it will just be XP SP3. It works, you do not need to believe me, just ask any Windows user “When Vista comes out all security problems will be solved”. The important thing is beliefs not facts.

    Shake up the talent
    Again, who cares? We keep selling. Why firing staff who keep selling. If we are able to sell with what we offer the way we do it means we do not need to shake up anything. We’re doing just right. Imagine any other company slipping dates and cutting features like we do on Vista. They will be out of business in no time. We still have our customers believe Vista will come and smoke competition. Again, just say it and they’ll believe it. Our staff is expert on spins. All we need to convince our customers to keep buying.

    Stop making crap
    Why? It sells just fine.

  15. Steve Ballmer just said that the company’s delayed Vista operating system and Office 2007 program could be Microsoft’s ‘most exciting offerings ever’.

    See, we just need to say it and our customers believe it.

    Steve just said that he will be ‘the champion of innovations’. Soon our customers will repeat that “Microsoft is the champion of innovations”. When Vista will be out our customers will say “AH ha, here is where Apple got all his ideas for OS X”.

    It works, it just works. You just need to have the right profile for customers: there’s a lot more of our customers than Apple’s ones. We know which human profile is most common.

  16. Although Microsoft Executive’s statements are satirical, they do have a nugget of truth in them — Windows runs on expectations and hopes for a glorious future that never quite arrives. It reminds me most strongly of Islamic fundamentalism. Believe in the glory of the caliphate as the world collapses around you. Baghdad Bob speaks the truth — oh no, Iraq is defeated! Why doesn’t Windows work? It’s always somebody else’s fault, just like the problems of the Islamic world are always the fault of Israel or the U.S. There’s something freakish about the reality denials issued by companies and cults in decline.

  17. Loved it.

    This is why Zune will probably suck. I am guessing the design will be marginal to decent (don’t know if the images available so far are actually the final thing), but there are guaranteed to be extraneous buttons and the MS logo attached somewhere. The menus will likely be byzantine. Even without the complication of wireless downloads to the player itself, the file management is nearly guaranteed to be confusing and a bitch to some RIAA/MPAA-desired DRM scheme.

    I thought their work with Xbox might give hope here, but the more I think about it, the less I think the work there is instructive. Xbox – bigger, better, faster, more. Video games need that to improve. Media players? Yeah, bigger screen, but really, no one is ever to watch too much video on a 2.5-3 inch screen. Bigger storage? Sure, I would love 100 GB, but most folks have 5-10 GB of music and with the screen size, there is not much cause to haul around video (I don’t think anyone yet has the killer external screen to pair the iPod with…lots of interesting stuff, but not yet). Even then, storage is
    not a battle that can be won because MS and Apple both buy their storage, so they will end up being equal. Slimmer, maybe. Features – WiFi/wirless. Sure, but if MS can do it, Apple can. Not sure yet that there is a use that will not cost the consumer a premium (I suspect wireless DLs will cost more than online DLs). Basically, it comes down to ease of use, both in the menu system and integration. This is not a MS strong suit.

    The interesting thing here is if the pissed off partners (iRiver, etc) will give a giant fuck you to MS, or suck it up and try to create a Zune ecosystem. Even if Zune itself is good, the lack of an ecosystem (if MS does stick everything plus a blender on the Zune, it will by definition not be good) will hinder it. They could enter an already crowded iPod ecosystem or go where there currently is a vacuum. Maybe MS will throw them a bone and give them a headstart.

  18. I wouldn’t get too excited. This is nothing less than Manes’ pathetically cynical set up for Vista. When Vista is released, Manes will proclaim Microsoft has answered his plea and laud Vista as the greatest single release of commercial software ever.

  19. “Stop making crap!”

    Just to set the record straight, Microsoft isn’t MAKING crap – it’s me! Yeah, I’m making the crap! It’s right out my ass. Farmer Brown sells it to Bill – he drops by every Friday and picks it up.

  20. Earth to Stephen Manes:

    There’s a very simple way to solve all this…

    STOP BUYING THEIR CRAP!

    There are alternatives, (Mac or Linux), if you’re not willing to even contemplate these then stop complaining – you deserve everything you get.

  21. gagravaar,

    Now, U don’t expect windows users to think for themselves!? ” width=”19″ height=”19″ alt=”wink” style=”border:0;” /> They will all run out to buy Crapista the day it comes out. Later, they will cry to each other because their boxes can’t handle Aero.

  22. ppl i´m trying to switch my intire family to mac but they can´t,that only means that they are ignorants,my father buy a vaio but don´t use it because its too complex,my mother only uses on her enterprise pcs and my sister only uses a 1gen shuffle but when it comes to macs my father comes only to my internet and he knows how it works and my sister has began how to work on itunes.I guess that this real fact only asks for the world to change for apple,and this is not world dominacion.

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