Enderle: New iPad is a ‘penis iron’ and Meg Whitman is clearly a bigger asset to HP than Cook is to Apple’

“Last week was an interesting week. Apple announced what appears to be a penis iron in the new iPad, and folks are burning through their monthly 4G data plans in a few hours,” Rob Enderle writes for TechNewsWorld. “Tim’s having his first Antennagate moment, and Steve Jobs he isn’t.”

“On the other hand, Meg Whitman announced her first major restructuring since taking over HP, and on paper it not only looks impressive, but also is reminiscent of what Carly Fiorina attempted to do in a lot of ways,” Enderle writes. “Fiorina was considered a strong visionary — she just wasn’t good with people and couldn’t execute. Whitman appears to have Fiorina’s vision and can execute, which bodes well for HP.”

Enderle writes, “Ironically, the stock market continues to reward Apple and punish HP, which suggests the market remains consistently out of step with reality.”

MacDailyNews Take: Maybe not the market, Robbie. What did we tell you about taking your meds?

“Cook has been increasingly compared to Jobs and found wanting. His last two product launches weren’t very exciting, and the new iPad appears to have serious problems. People have been writing to tell me they are returning theirs,” Enderle writes. “The problems range from poor WiFi reception and WAN data plans that run through their monthly allocation in hours, to the very high temperature that the iPad operates at, which Consumer Reports says could cause burns if held for a long period…”

MacDailyNews Take: Consumer Reports said no such thing. Consumer Reports said, “When it was at its hottest, it felt very warm but not especially uncomfortable if held for a brief period.” Extrapolating that it “could cause burns if held for a long period” is baseless. Not only that, it might just be actionable. Hello, Apple Legal?

• Expert: iPad heat claims overblown, not a real issue – March 22, 2012
• Consumer Reports’ bombshell: New iPad runs hotter than predecessor but ‘not especially uncomfortable’ – March 20, 2012
• Like clockwork: Let the iPad ‘overheating’ FUD begin! – March 20, 2012
• Infrared test shows more powerful new iPad running a safe 10-degrees warmer than iPad 2 – March 20, 2012

Enderle writes, “We already know Cook can’t present like Steve Jobs, and it is as yet unclear whether the proper balance is being maintained between design, engineering and finance. With this device alone, you could argue it is not a good balance, based on these problems (best to wait for the newer iPad).”

Full article – Think Before You Click™here.

MacDailyNews Take: This one is so bad, we really can’t tell if it’s trying to be serious or of it’s meant to be a joke.

Enderle seems to think of himself as some sort of tech expert for hire (pay him and he’ll write/say just about anything) even though he’s nothing more than a ham-handed, cheesily-goateed FUD vomiter who truly is a remarkably awful writer. He thinks he’s a marketing genius, but the only thing at which he’s a genius is branding himself an idiot extraordinaire who routinely gets things spectacularly wrong (please see related articles below.)

According to the website of the Enderle Group (Rob, his wife Mary, and their dog), “There may also be organizations where we have a personal, vested interest. These relationships will be disclosed directly in any written or verbal communications where the relationship becomes material. For example, if an employee sits on the board of an organization that is being discussed or written about, it will be disclosed.” Yet, for some reason, this TechNewsWorld article completely fails to mention that Rob Enderle sits on HP’s “advisory council.” Whoops!

Presumably, he advises HP on how to take their daily ass-kicking from Apple as mindlessly as he takes his from people who actually understand technology and can see where things are really going.

[Thanks to MacDailyNews Reader “Carl H.” for the heads up.]

Related articles:
Enderle: Apple’s secret ‘fifth column’ saboteurs beat Microsoft, Dell, HP, Google – June 1, 2010
Rob Enderle: One idiot to rule them all – January 25, 2010
Rob Enderle couldn’t analyze his way out of a wet paper bag – July 24, 2009
Enderle: Apple didn’t change the world – May 04, 2009
Enderle: Apple’s marketing mistakes mirror those made by Republicans in U.S. presidential race – November 03, 2008
Enderle claims Apple iPhone hasn’t made a dent in RIM – July 25, 2008
Enderle: Is Apple rotting from the inside out? – December 28, 2007
Enderle: Apple’s iMac updates are modest and late; Apple lagging behind HP – August 08, 2007
Enderle’s infinite loop: ‘This year will be really nasty for Apple’ – January 22, 2007
Enderle revels in ‘collapsing’ iTunes Store sales that are actually surging – December 18, 2006
Enderle: Microsoft’s Zune could be very successful – November 07, 2006
Enderle: ‘4th quarter will be Apple’s hardest since the first iPod Christmas’ – September 18, 2006
Enderle: Anticipating an Apple-Google Merger – September 05, 2006
Enderle: Microsoft’s ‘iPod killer’ Zune is ‘brilliant strategy’ – July 24, 2006
Big surprise: Enderle was wrong about Apple’s holiday quarter Mac sales – January 19, 2006
Enderle: Microsoft’s ‘PlaysForSure’ going to be a long-term problem for Apple – January 09, 2006
Enderle: ‘Some people got really excited by the new iPod, but a growing number of people did not’ – October 19, 2005
Judgement Day waits for Rob ‘fourth quarter should be ugly for Apple’ Enderle – October 11, 2005
Tech pundit Enderle: ‘Microsoft wrote the first Mac OS’ – September 28, 2005
Tech pundit Enderle: Apple’s Mac has about 12 months to prepare for Windows Vista threat – September 19, 2005
Tech pundit Enderle incorrectly compares Apple’s Mac OS to iPod licensing – September 01, 2005
Tech Pundit Enderle: ‘fourth quarter should be ugly for Apple’ – August 09, 2005
Enderle: ‘iPod Halo Effect is just a myth, same thing as having Paris Hilton visit Apple stores’ – May 02, 2005
Tech Pundit Enderle: ‘This year will be more difficult for Apple Computer’ and iMacs in earthquakes – January 24, 2005
Mary Enderle: Apple iMac G5 ‘isn’t a good desktop design, seems poorly thought out’ – September 10, 2004
Enderle: maybe it’s time for Apple and Sun to merge – August 10, 2004


  1. U Know what, ” it is Pure Envy” with Rob.
    U see Microsucks is “persona non grata” in the Heart of the General Public, and that is what is behind his Diatribe.
    Hey Rob, don’t wait until October to get Any traction from Windows 8, Because that will not Stem the Bloodbath.

    (Go take ur Meds u Jackass)

  2. Regardless of the stupid things he writes, I never imagined having “Fiorina” and “visionary” wirtten in the same sentence.

    Fiorina destroyed HP. She annihilated what HP was about, its core vision, its core business. If Meg Whitman is a version 2 of Carly Fiorina…. HP is doomed indeed.

  3. Underwear seems to forget that Apple is making record profits while HP is struggling. Apple has a clear forward vision, HP has re-organized 3 times already and has been in a holding pattern.
    Why is the obvious so hard for Underwear to comprehend!

  4. The Enderle Group is comprised of Rob, his wife and his dog (seriously) – They have one client -Microsoft – who pays them a ton of money ( the dog has a six figure salary ) to bad mouth Apple, while pretending to be independent.

    1. Actually HP is paying him this month.

      There is a consultant’s fee for everything he writes. It is easy to see who is paying for his drivel just by the contents of the article he just shat out.

  5. “Ironically, the stock market continues to reward Apple and punish HP, which suggests the market remains consistently out of step with reality.””

    Now, that’s ironic.

    Enderle should sit next to Daisey, since they like to fib so much.

  6. What the heck is a Penis Iron? Is that a gay slur that Rob Enderle used against Tim Cook? That should be brought to people’s attention.

    It still surprises me that Bay Area news networks still quote Enderle. KTVU should be ashamed of themselves

  7. what’s better than MDN retorts to bs articles?
    I read the comments before the article !

    very entertaining and enlightening.

    disclosure: I love AAPL.

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