“Claiming that he completely forgot about the much-hyped electronic device until the last minute, a frantic Steve Jobs reportedly stayed up all night Tuesday in a desperate effort to design Apple’s new tablet computer,” The Onion, America’s Finest News Source, reports.
“Middle-of-the-night sources reported that Jobs then began work on double-spacing his Keynote presentation and increasing the font size to make it appear longer,” The Onion reports.
Full news brief here.
Apple is widely expected to unveil its long-rumored first foldable iPhone later this year, and a fresh leak suggests the device may carry…
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Apple is in discussions with its suppliers over a welcome dilemma: surging demand for the MacBook Neo has far exceeded expectations…
Apple TV on Tuesday revealed a first look at the second season of the acclaimed sci-fi series “Dark Matter,” which is set to make its global…
Apple Arcade is set to delight families with the arrival of Nick Jr. Replay! on May 7, an exciting new game filled with beloved characters…
I hope this turns out better than his half hearted efforts that produced the iPhone, iMac, and iPod…
(tongue firmly in cheek)
I wonder if he’ll have puffy or bloodshot eyes at the keynote…
lol…. the onion has a mind of it’s own
“… the onion has a mind of it’s [it is] own.” Huh?
The Onion rocks
Ah, perryman, if it weren’t for Spelling Nazis, what would the Internet be?
Good catch, mein Kapitän.
Looking forward in that case to those Balmeresque sweaty armpits.
Onion Rock!
A few months ago, some European news agency picked up one of their stories and ran with it, not realizing it was satire. Forgot the details, but was funny “and embarrassing for them”
This makes me giggle!
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I think the Onion meant Steve Ballmer, not Steve Jobs.
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When did MDN start quoting The Onion?
This brings back memories from one too many college assignments…
I like the 9 iPhones glued to a cafeteria tray… What a vision that produces…
And held lovingly in both hands with the Moses coming down from the mountain illustration in the background!
The Onion is truly the best gnuz source around.
I’m not that big of an Onion fan. Occasionally, they crank out a pretty funny piece, but it’s more often than not I find it lacking in creativity, and actually pretty lame.
For instance, in this case, the satire would be better served to whack Apple for something they do that we DON’T like: Making us spend money on things we don’t even really need, for instance. Pooping out an ill-conceived, half-baked product isn’t a typical Apple modus operandi, so the “whipped it out last night” line doesn’t really even make sense.
Now, if there was a satire piece about Ballmer & Co. announcing a half-baked me-too product they’d be pooping out about a year from now, THAT would be good satire. Wait… Maybe that would just be news.
“Steve Jobs pulled an all-nighter”
Not surprised. One night is all it takes to come up with the idea of a bigger iPod Touch.
“Frantic Steve Jobs pulls all-nighter designing Apple tablet.”
Total bulsh. If anything he may have worked late on his presentation etc.
Wow….. Steve is the man!
Steve Jobs can do more by himself with one all-nighter than Microsoft can do in 5 years.
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“Steve Jobs can do more by himself with one all-nighter than Microsoft can do in 5 years.”
— Ken 1W
I like the thought.