“A group of academics will be among the first people outside Microsoft to see Sphere, a spherical surface computer developed by Microsoft Research,” Ina Fried reports or CNET News.
MacDailyNews Take: If this were any other company, we’d swear this was a joke, but this is what happens when “Microsoft Research” strays from its primary focus: 1 Infinite Loop, Cupertino, CA 95014.
Fried continues, “The sphere-shaped, multitouch computer is similar to the tabletop Surface computer that Microsoft announced last year… This incarnation, however, remains a project within Microsoft Research and the company has no current plans to bring it to market.”
MacDailyNews Take: We can’t wait for Microsoft’s Big Ass Toilet Seat. Now that would sell – to women (guys would leave it up all the time). If it offered the gals some haptics, the lines would stretch for miles.
Fried continues, “Bill Gates has talked about a vision for surface computing that stretches far beyond the high-end commercial applications of Surface and in several years’ time would have many, many of today’s surfaces becoming computerized, both at home and at work.”
MacDailyNews Take: Because he’s such a visionary (dripping with sarcasm).
Full article here.
Todd Bishop reports for The Seattle Post-Intelligencer, “Sphere will be shown Tuesday at the annual Microsoft Research Faculty Summit alongside other projects from Microsoft and university researchers.”
Video: Microsoft’s Big Ass Ball:
Direct link to video here.
Full article here.
[Thanks to MacDailyNews Readers too numerous to mention for the heads up.]
MacDailyNews Take: Steven P. Jobs on a popsicle stick! After they reverse themselves and bring it to market, Microsoft is going to corner the entire novelty world globe market which is worth… wait for it… ONE MILLLLLION DOLLARS!
At this rate, “Vanquishing the Borg” is going to be easier than we thought.
Go, Ballmer, Go! Shovel that filthy lucre into your giant cash furnace, you sweaty SOB!
[Originally posted at 1:03pm EDT. Updated: 3:31pm EDT with new photo illustration and some additional “Takes.]
Ah comeon you must surely remember me. Im your biggest paint in the ass. I call you what you really are Koolaide guzzling mindless drones, so far up Jobs ass you cant see the light of day!!!
Oh and Chrissy will remember, so will Ampar, Shen …….
ahhh its good to be home….
Do you smell that…. ah yeah that undeniable smell of fear from Jobs, shitting his pants because he knows he cant keep up.
“I call you what you really are Koolaide guzzling mindless drones, so far up Jobs ass you cant see the light of day!!!”
Yeah, yeah. So what’s your point?
Andy,
Uh, I haven’t had the nerve to ask yet.
Have you ever watched one of those nature programs where the little male Black Widow spider is trying to put the moves on the big female. He’s gotta be real careful or he’s a goner.
I figure a little more buttering up is probably the prudent course of action. Hey, wanna try the old ‘good cop / bad cop routine’ again?
@ Sir Gill Bates
Doesn’t the female Black Widow bite the male’s head off after the deed anyway? At least it’s over quickly…
But I’m sure Chrissy One is worth the risk! We will prevail!
Andy,
I think the female praying mantis chews the males head off first while he’s still going at it. Ouch! The Black Widow just drains the innards out of the poor guy. Either way, it sure sucks being one of them. Not as bad as being a Vista user, but still …
“We will prevail!”
Exact quote from Jim Jones!!! You win a cookie
Oh and by the way the pray mantis bites the head off the male… the Black widow kills and eats there “lucky” partner. You be able to look that up if you werent so busy trying to keep your macs running.
Oh arent you a clever one not as bad as a Vista users…. just a moment,,, there it is …… nope not funny….
Crash,
Say what? So apparently, all the time you were away you were in a coma, eh Crash. Well, I have bad news buddy, yer not out of it yet. Can you spell ‘world’ backwards for me? It’s one of those comprehension things they do in the hospitals.
No can do? Just as I thought. Please go back and read the previous comments. Mine and yours. Read them verrry slowly.
See the one you made that stated: “Im your biggest paint in the ass.”
Now what kind of sick, demented shit is that Crash?
Please explain yourself. I’ll wait.
Crash,
And another thing:
” “We will prevail!”
Exact quote from Jim Jones!!! You win a cookie.”
So, you kept all the Kool-Aid for yourself?
@Not Bill
No, they stole Dreamcast to make X Box.
Microsoft Polyp®
Is it me or does this guy sound like Sid from Ice Age?
It would be a good teaching tool in schools and museums. But it looks like it infringes on Apple’s multi-touch patents.
don,
“Microsoft Polyp®”
That was great! I’ll be chuckling over that one for awhile.
Hmmm. It should probably be excised before it becomes cancerous.
Everybody sing!
I see a a progression here…
Table, Sphere,
Next-
Big Assed Sphincter. (It’ “winks” at you)
Well, a sphincter is pretty much a torus (ring, for the non-mathematically inclined) so with their progression of shapes, it may not be far off. This current one’s like a hemorrhoid that lost its grip on the asshole it was irritating.
As a novelty it looks like a few minutes of fun. Being able to zoom in like Google Earth would be good too but as for anything more practical and useful, I can’t see much use?
The person who suggested surface computing on the inside of a toilet bowl has struck on an unrealized gaming market. Imagine the possibilities!
Like… Battleship.
Little ships cruising around, and you have to pee them out of the water. “You sunk my battleship!”
I would definitely start drinking more beer if I could do this.
The person who suggested surface computing on the inside of a toilet bowl has struck on an unrealized gaming market. Imagine the possibilities!
Like… Battleship.
Little ships cruising around, and you have to pee them out of the water. “You sunk my battleship!”
I would definitely start drinking more beer if I could do this.
@ Kev Orng
You crapped on my battleship.
Bring it on.
What a HORRIBLE shape for a multitouch input device! about 50% of it will be inaccessable and unviewable to every user that comes across it.
With a sphere-shaped object like that, you can only use what you could see, which at any given time, could never be more than whatever hemispherical aspect is facing you, and even then, touching the parts you can see will be a challenge to perform comfortably for the areas that lie near/along the “visual edges” of the sphere. Repeat, the only useable surface area would be, at a theoretical and practical maximum, 50% of the sphere at any given time. a DOME.
And on top of that, it will most likely rest on the ground, or mounted on some kind of stand, which effectively cuts off visual/tactile access to the bottom sections, IN ADDITION to the limits i just described.
the only possible way i could see this being at all useful would be if it could be suspended magnetically at eye level, without stands or wires protruding from it (uh-oh, power source? you’ll need an ugly/unweildy cord coming out somewhere) for power, and even then the only application for it would be for a 3D Google Earth type presentation.
and forget about zooming in, i can’t in any way visualize how that would look on a 360º surface, but i imagine not too pretty.
So, yet again, M$ has a fun idea, and a spiffy prototype, but fails MISERABLY at its execution. There’s a reason why flat displays are the norm, and not displays with such extreme curves.
now my 2¢. if any hardware developer REALLY wanted to impress me, they’d do the same, but in the form factor of a cube (preferably with a tiny/no bezel around the edges. With that type of design, you could have 5 independent display surfaces that would be excellent in a classroom, lab, or workplace environment, as you could station 4 desks or chairs around it for multiple users.
such a multiple-user display device would be something that i can honestly see Apple working on, as it would actually simplify environments and solve problems instead of needlessly creating new ones without actually solving any to begin with. If anyone at Apple is reading, PLEASE do some R&D;on the idea. you’ll be walking into a goldmine ;D
– p.
They’ll soon get around to a mini iMax Screen, develop that into a helmet, which you can wear while on the subway. A new sport will develop: you carry around a baseball bat, wait for one of those spherical helmetheads to walk by, and WHACKO!