“A group of academics will be among the first people outside Microsoft to see Sphere, a spherical surface computer developed by Microsoft Research,” Ina Fried reports or CNET News.
MacDailyNews Take: If this were any other company, we’d swear this was a joke, but this is what happens when “Microsoft Research” strays from its primary focus: 1 Infinite Loop, Cupertino, CA 95014.
Fried continues, “The sphere-shaped, multitouch computer is similar to the tabletop Surface computer that Microsoft announced last year… This incarnation, however, remains a project within Microsoft Research and the company has no current plans to bring it to market.”
MacDailyNews Take: We can’t wait for Microsoft’s Big Ass Toilet Seat. Now that would sell – to women (guys would leave it up all the time). If it offered the gals some haptics, the lines would stretch for miles.
Fried continues, “Bill Gates has talked about a vision for surface computing that stretches far beyond the high-end commercial applications of Surface and in several years’ time would have many, many of today’s surfaces becoming computerized, both at home and at work.”
MacDailyNews Take: Because he’s such a visionary (dripping with sarcasm).
Full article here.
Todd Bishop reports for The Seattle Post-Intelligencer, “Sphere will be shown Tuesday at the annual Microsoft Research Faculty Summit alongside other projects from Microsoft and university researchers.”
Video: Microsoft’s Big Ass Ball:
Direct link to video here.
Full article here.
[Thanks to MacDailyNews Readers too numerous to mention for the heads up.]
MacDailyNews Take: Steven P. Jobs on a popsicle stick! After they reverse themselves and bring it to market, Microsoft is going to corner the entire novelty world globe market which is worth… wait for it… ONE MILLLLLION DOLLARS!
At this rate, “Vanquishing the Borg” is going to be easier than we thought.
Go, Ballmer, Go! Shovel that filthy lucre into your giant cash furnace, you sweaty SOB!
[Originally posted at 1:03pm EDT. Updated: 3:31pm EDT with new photo illustration and some additional “Takes.]
This does nothing that two or more flat screens can’t do better, except maybe for use as a virtual globe. Most expensive globe ever.
My point: this sphere is not much more significantly useful than on any other shape they choose to put their technology. I agree with the useless tech demo comment.
It’s a product that wants us to believe has a trajectory, but the only trajectory is useless demos.
my opinion.
Did any else notice the multy touching and the way photos were manipulated?
Didn’t Apple already do this with the iPhone?
Didn’t Apple patent the hell out of it?
Ballmer – you fat, sweaty, mongoloid….
Keep up the good work!
To all those who use the term ‘haters’:
The term has NO meaning – it also suggests that those who use it have a serious issue with criticism – ie a too fragile ego.
See a Doctor, one with ‘Psychiatrist’ on his door.
BTW, the sphere is further proof that MSFT is fscked, big time.
“Wonder if it bluescreens?”
great, microsoft blueballs, coming soon…..
It’s all in the emphasis:
big-ass BALL -or-
big ASS ball!
“… the company has no plans to bring it to market.”
Well, at least someone at MS recognizes there’s absolutely no market for this. Seriously, what is gained by displaying a two-dimensional image on a spherical surface? MS has lost any sense of what’s important;this is technology without benefit, an attempt to show there is some modicum of creativity left in the company, however ill-directed.
Next up from Microsofts ‘skunk works’ :
The giant piece of cheese!
A huge piece of cheese, with touch-cheese capabilities, and when you get hungry, you can eat chunks off it!
Warning:
The big cheese may smell after a period of time, and if you eat the cheese, there are electronic components that can cause a choking hazard in very small children.
Embedded chips in edible products from Microsoft – what do you want to eat today?
What a horrible demo!
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This thing will obviously have very limited uses and most of the ones demoed are *not* them. All that nonsense about multi-person “social” uses is, well… nonsense.
You can’t carry it, so it will have to be installed somewhere like the table. That means kiosks or dedicated custom uses in research.
It seems to have some utility for maps and displaying of 3D spaces but that’s about it. Another $10,000 computer with limited specialised functionality. Who would buy this?
I am guessing that this and the MS Table are just research products that would never have seen the light of day due to their very limited functionality/practicality if not for the debut of the iPhone.
This item was inspired by the charismatic Steve Ballmer. In fact, the first prototype was painted to resemble Ballmer’s head, in every minute detail.
Unfortunately for the designers, the FrankenSphere was so lifelike, that it literally oozed sweat, and no one could bear to touch the thing.
I can’t believe how many people are ready to dismiss this as stupid just because it’s from Microsoft. Admittedly it’s a niche market, but if you don’t think that the eventual uses for a spherical display are exciting then you just aren’t using your imagination. It’s just a matter of time before this type of technology will be appearing in every planetarium, and then in every science classroom. Haven’t you ever thought about how cool it would be to see continental drift demonstrated on a globe rather than on a flat screen? I think anyone who loves maps could come up with countless ideas for animated/changeable globes.
@shen The new acronym will be BBOD (Blue Balls of Death). Death by blue balls, what a miserable way to go.
Do you ever get the feeling that MDN might go a little out of their way to antagonize the weak sisters who cry about this site being so uncouth? I’m not complaining, mind you.
Maybe one day they will do a surface computer on the inside of a toilet bowl.
“That has to be the most pathetic attempt at innovation I have ever seen. Its ridiculous.. Sphere, what genius conjured that up! What are these losers smoking while they are watching Star Trek reruns? Are we all gonna walk around with Spheres in our pockets? I wonder if you can run Zune software on a Sphere. Wonder if it bluescreens?”
Of course it doesn’t bluescreen.
It blue balls.
@BobM
read above to find out why people think this is not imaginative. Teachers buy demo units for things like continental drift. You’ve just come up with a pretty expensive display for 1% of the curriculum content.
anyway, it’s not a real product. The joke here is that M$ isn’t creative, but they want us to believe this is creative. I agree with Raymond in DC.
The Great Apple Fanboy Massacre,
“Has it ever occurred to you that not all technologies are developed to be portable consumer devices?”
This was originally MicroSoft’s idea for a new trackball mouse.
OMG. Is this what passes for innovation at Microsoft? This would be funny if it weren’t so incredibly tragic. This is from the same company that gave us Excel? (and first on a Mac) Win95? (yeah, a kludge, but an impressive one) NT? (a modern OS kernel) Office for the Mac 98? (still one of the best implementations of the Office suite on any platform)
I know that this is an official Microsoft bashing zone, but Microsoft has created some important moments in personal computing. Spherical computing? Oh, lord, how sad…
What is this bull, Ballmer’s benoit ball? They sink millions into a product that has about as much market demand as the Zune or Microsoft Bob. What other shape from Euclidean geometry will they multi-touch next?
I’m considering getting one of these to put on my iTele. The problem is the weight might be so great that it would throw off the route precision during an intergalactic teleport causing me to end up somewhere I’m not supposed to be.
The good old folks at Microsoft’s R & D Department are so old and out of touch that there in to their second childhood and now there playing with tables and balls…SAD!
Is this what stockholder through they were funding… bullshit balls!
I don’t think that I want a ball setting on my desk, taking up desktop space anytime soon!
Just think, in Microsoft’s little world, we can all choose between a 12″, 24″ or a whopping 48″ ball… my balls are bigger then yours! <GRIN>
Then there was the turd… that they tried to pass off as a M3 Player and iPod killer.. which has all but gone down the drain via the flushing tool!
What’s next… the EGG?
Yes, this is creative in a totally impractical kind of way, like something you would see at Disney. I’m sure there’s some value in letting your engineers run wild, but it’s kind of like letting the world view your kid’s $3 billion science project.
They seem to have no clue on how to identify real, practical needs and make enjoyable solutions.
Next up – The Big Ass Column. A big ass surface in the shape of a large column in a hall, flanked on both sides by the big ass balls, that symbolizes MSFT Research.
The ball MSFT really needs to look at is the magic 8 ball – shake it up and see their future….
The Big Ass Table turned into a sphere how innovative. Still years away from being a consumer product. The variation on a theme, is what Microsoft is using to show their relevance in the future of computing?
The sphere is still using old technologies with projection imaging and camera position captures of the touch. All the same old tech used for their big ass table parlor trick which requires much, much more power to work then Apple’s true Multi-touch surface. Microsoft needs a reality check and they need to take some classes on what real innovation is all about. Smoke and mirror parlor tricks is no longer going to make a technology company. Customers and investors want to see real innovation.