In the wide-ranging chat with Guy Kawasaki, a venture capitalist and one of the first employees at Apple and noted former Apple evangelist, Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer “addressed criticism about Windows Vista, launched a few subtle jabs at Apple, and even re-enacted an infamous dance that earned him web video fame and earned him the unflattering nickname of ‘Monkey Boy’ in some internet circles,” Daisuke Wakabayashi reports for Reuters.
“Mr Kawasaki did not hesitate to bring up past embarrassing moments for Mr Ballmer, including references in an lawsuit that claimed Mr Ballmer threw a chair at a former employee who said he was leaving Microsoft for Google,” Wakabayashi reports. “‘Don’t pick up a chair and throw it at me,’ Mr Kawasaki said with a laugh. ‘Don’t go monkey on me either.’
“At one point, Mr Kawasaki asked Mr Ballmer if he viewed Apple like a Chihuahua that Microsoft kicks off its leg from time to time. Mr Ballmer proceeded to yelp like a dog before praising Apple,” Wakabayashi reports. “Later, in response to Mr Ballmer’s statement that Apple ‘punted’ in web services, Mr Kawasaki, known for his ardent support of Apple products, said Apple may argue that Microsoft has punted in operating systems, a reference to some consumer dissatisfaction with the new Windows Vista operating system.”
“‘They’d be wrong. Every day, statistically they’d be wrong. Last time I checked, there were a lot of governments that think we have a very high market share,’ said Mr Ballmer, who joked earlier that Mr Kawasaki’s super-thin Apple MacBook Air lacked half the features of a PC,” Wakabayashi reports.
Ballmer also “pledged that the company would gain share against Google in online advertising and web searching, even if it’s his ‘last breath’ at the company,” Wakabayashi reports.
Full article here.
Kathleen Lau reports for ComputerWorld Canada, “Not surprisingly, Microsoft Corp.’s CEO Steve Ballmer is short on praises for the MacBook Air. Joking that the laptop is heavier than his PC, he pretended to stumble from his chair from the weight of the device in his hands during a speech in Las Vegas Thursday. ‘That thing’s missing half the things on my PC. Where’s the DVD drive?'”
“Ballmer also commended Apple Inc. when jokingly asked by Kawasaki whether he perceived the company as ‘this little Chihuahua that you just kick away.’ After failing to resist the urge to mimic the bark of a Chihuahua, Ballmer said Microsoft has a larger footprint and that it’s ‘trying to continue to compete with all our vigour and energy,'” Lau reports.
Full article here.
[Thanks to MacDailyNews Reader “Citymark” for the heads up.]
Market share is all Microtanic has; they can’t say they have the superior OS, because that has never been true. But, the days of Micrtosoft counting on the general public’s tech ignorance is waning. That’s probably why all Ballmer seems to want to talks about (in the full article) is Google, Google, Google and making Microsoft into an online search and advertising instead of trying to continue tot sell them bloated, spaghetti-coded, upside-down and backwards poorly-faked Mac OSes.
Ballmer’s PC laptop can have all the serial ports his tiny pea brain desires, but it’ll always be missing Mac OS X and the superior Mac-only apps. Only Apple Macs can run everything that’s worth running. Ballmer’s OS-limited PC is crippled from the outset. And, if you really want a full featured notebook, Apple hasn’t stopped making the MacBook and the powerful MacBook Pro; in fact, they just updated them, as Ballmer likely knows all too well.
Lastly, a toast: “May Steve Ballmer helm Microsoft for as long as it takes!
“there were a lot of governments that think we have a very high market share”
the same governments who are suing them?
“including references in an lawsuit that claimed Mr Ballmer threw a chair at a former employee who said he was leaving Microsoft for Google,”
Holy crap! I thought he threw a chair across the room when told of that guy leaving for Google by someone else. I had no idea he threw it at the guy!!!
Ballmer is a bigger @$$ than I ever thought. He is one of those people that a friend from college was referring to when he said some people in this world need a good @$$ whopping every once in a while just to keep them in line. So true.
Video??
“…even if it’s his ‘last breath’ at the company”
Don’t tease me, Ballmer.
Hahahaha! It will be his “last breath” at Smallandflaccid, and they still won’t do it.
Although he fools himself on a lot of things concerning Apple and the future of technology, he seems to be a pretty cool guy that I’d love to shoot pool with.
Below is the part where he’s asked to do Monkey boy dance. He handles it really well and his final joke is funny.
It’s nice how this leading software company that it the best in the business is still ‘trying to continue to compete with all our vigour and energy,’. Trying? Wow… why don’t you call me when you start succeeding at something.
“is” the best…
“Joking that the laptop is heavier than his PC, he pretended to stumble from his chair from the weight of the device in his hands during a speech in Las Vegas Thursday”
Will someone tell Monkey Boy that a joke has to be plausible for it to be funny.
Here is the video.
From the second article:
“Kawasaki then attempted a second try of his “What’s the deal with Vista” question, after Ballmer had strategically avoided answering the original blunt query with his Mac Air antics.”
Ahhh, so that explains his weak attempt at humor. Just like a little kid who doesn’t want to answer the tough questions from his parents. Sad.
Sorry for the manic posting today, folks. Mugshots is brewing their coffee strong today.
“Ballmer eventually explained, is that application and driver compatibility was compromised in the name of security, a decision that ultimately proved “very painful” for the consumer.”
Ahhhh, so that’s why Fista sucks so bad. Riggghhhhhhttttt…..
the reason why ms are on a losing streak is information and how easy it is to get on the net
they’d love to control it , so they could convince everyone it’s not crap
knowledge is power , no wonder those cretins at ms are on a losing streak to nowhere
The session concluded with Kawasaki saying he knew Ballmer really wanted a MacBook Air. “If you ever want a discount, I have friends,” he said.
Cubert… no kidding.
Listen to the tone of Ballmer’s voice. The AC must have been on high because he was so nervous his shirt should have been soaked… as it usually is.
Microsoft should have learned by now, if you’re going to copy/steal from someone who’s clearly better, then you should at least get it right.
There’s a scene from Act III of Wagner’s Die Meistersinger von Nürnberg that illustrates it perfectly. There’s a singing contest with a woman as the prize (yeah, that’s opera for you). Walter is the good guy. Beckmesser steals a love song from Walter to sing at the contest, his version comes out like the rantings of a lunatic… it’s pretty funny, actually.
So, I dub Ballmer the Beckmesser of technology.
Link to full video, via Guy’s own site:
http://blog.guykawasaki.com/2008/03/mano-a-mano-wit.html
‘That thing’s missing half the things on my PC. Where’s the DVD drive?’
Right next to the HD-DVD drive.
Oh, wait…
The video is pretty funny. Kawasaki says everything that crosses his mind.
Barking Ballmer. Real nice mental picture there. Couldn’t resist the urge to imitate a chihuahua or do the Monkey-Boy dance.
Buffoon.
Ballmer is chip short of a PC.. I really believe he is way beyond his depth.
Rather proved by the fact no-one consults him if he only gets 60 emails a day and doesn’t need anyone to filter for him.
Enlightening.
I love having a laugh at Ballmer’s expense, but why does the MDN take always have to sound like a fanatical sales pitch??
I hope that Guy told Ballmer to go bite a fat hog in the ass.
It would be like watching a dog chase his tail.
@Mr. Reeee,
Kudos to you for the literary analogy!
Much better than my spoiled little kid analogy, but both hit the nail on the head. And, better the nail than my head via a Unidentified Flying Ballmer Object.
“why does the MDN take always have to sound like a fanatical sales pitch??”
Because you are at MDN that’s why. Most of us appreciate the humor. There are many more objective sites out there and even a few Winblows fanatic sites (usually linked to by sites for the delusional).
Hah! See, I did it, too.
I would have liked to heard Ballmer’s response to the success of the iPhone. Haven’t seen the video yet (thanks for the links) but imagine Guy could cover only so many of Microsoft’s blunders in the allocated time.
Peace.