“To its credit, despite my frequent, loudmouthed criticism, Microsoft has graciously offered to let me sit in on a Vista and Office launch event in New York. CEO Steve Ballmer will be there, and apparently there will be a ‘moderated Q&A’ after we have a little nosh,” Seth Jayson reports for The Motley Fool.
“I’d love to ask Ballmer, “Dude, can I ‘squirt’ you a little something from my brown Zune?” so he could see just how lame “the social” is in reality. Or I’d like to hit him with, “Why did uninstalling Office 2007 cripple my Office 2003 software?” and share my ongoing reinstallation nightmare,” Jayson writes. “But instead, I’m going to give this opportunity to all you Fools out there. Assuming they let me up to the mic following this little stunt, I hereby pledge my face time to ask a question of your suggestion.”
Jayson writes, “Wondering why Mr. Softy doesn’t just leave the portable media space to Apple? Want to know why it continues to butt heads with Google and Yahoo! on search, even though it’s getting trounced? Want to know why there’s still so little video and music content on the Xbox 360, despite serious, device-integrated challenges from Disney and Sony?”
Jayson writes, “Here’s your chance to query Microsoft.”
Send your suggestions to Mr. Seth Jayson here.
[Thanks to MacDailyNews Reader “Adam W.” for the heads up.]
Don’t bother sending “Why don’t you seek professional help?” as we’ve already sent that one in ourselves.
Related articles:
Microsoft CEO Ballmer laughs at Apple iPhone – January 17, 2007
Ballmer: ‘Zune halo effect’ will help Windows Vista – December 06, 2006
Ballmer analyzes Microsoft’s One Big Mistake, Vista… er, ‘One Big’ Vista Mistake – August 02, 2006
Ballmer: I’m Microsoft’s ‘primary champion of innovation’ – July 27, 2006
What happens when you combine clips of Young Frankenstein and Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer? – June 08, 2006
Microsoft CEO Ballmer spends two days unsuccessfully trying to clean Windows PC malware – June 05, 2006
Couldn’t you just buy a Mac and run Windows? Microsoft CEO Ballmer: ‘No, we prefer real PCs’ – April 29, 2006
Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer admits to brainwashing his kids not to use Apple iPods – March 28, 2006
Chair hurling Microsoft CEO Ballmer: ‘I’m going to f—ing kill Google’ – September 03, 2005
Microsoft CEO Steve Ballmer: ‘We love to be first’ – January 25, 2005
Microsoft CEO Ballmer: ‘Apple iPod users are music thieves’ – October 04, 2004
Real question. If Apple has had no security problems with an operating system built over a unix variant, why doesn’t microsoft just build their Vista over a unix variant?
Are you Zune Tang?
With all that squirting and sweating going on, have you considered just purchasing the rights to Scotchgard?
How bummed are you Apple kept so much of Leopard secret, did you consider pushing Vista’s release back until they did?
Mr. Balmer, er Baldy,
What will you say, when it is all said and done, and you go into eternity WITHOUT all your money, power, resources, and leverage, and stand accountable to God for what you have done here on earth, and HAVE to explain all the wealth and earthly success achieved with inferior, lesser than, uninspiring, unintuitive, unfinished, and stagnating products that have stagnated and stifled the entire tech industry in this country compared to the rest of the world, all for the only reason of padding your wallet and making you think your pretend friend 3rd-party companies are really true and loyal friends? History will show the last ten years
this country spinning its wheels tech-wise, while countries like China, Japan, Europe, and South Korea were eating our lunch. It’s not poliical, it is because of the Micro$oft monopoly! If you are going to lead and have power, you have to have the best product, and you DON”T.
“If Apple ceased to exist…where would any of their ideas come from?”
Is chair throwing an olympic sport in Redmond…
Just ignore him, like he’s not even there.
Here are my questions for Ballmer:
1) What’s on your iPod?
2) Do you plan to get the 4 or 8 gig iPhone?
3) How long have you been walking upright?
I Love the MDN Ballmer photo collection.
Why are the people running Microsoft evil?
Question: How does a clown like you get to be CEO of Microsoft?
Can I have your children?
Your potential. Our passion.
Do you consider that dorm assignment with Gates to be the single luckiest thing that has ever happened to any human being?
Nah, that’s the second single-luckiest.
The luckiest is having rich mommy and daddy lawyers who land your unqualified little hobby company a crucial exclusive deal with IBM. Remember, Bill didn’t even do that himself.
Wouldn’t you just be a fat bald used salesman somewhere today if you hadn’t been assigned to the same dorm as Bill Gates?
Ballmer would be an unemployed (and unemployable) washed up ex-salesman with about a ten page resume, if it weren’t for some bastard alignment of the stars. Oh what fate can hand out…
Put that ghonorea-laced thing back in your filthy mouth, dee-tee-dee.
HIlarious. My MDN Magic Word: develop
Can you explain the term “People Ready?”
When you need grudge sex, do you make Connie dress up to look like Eric Schmidt?
Do they treat you well in your cage?
What do you think of planet Earth? When are you going back?
Have you auditioned for Young Frankenstein II?
How many bananas do you eat per day?
Why are you such a twat?
Do you really believe Microsoft is an innovative company? Really? Please provide examples to justify your answer.
Wouldn’t you be a lot happier selling used cars?
How do you sleep at night?
When was the last time one of your children asked for an iPod? Have they asked since the Zune was released?
How many black turtlenecks do you own?
Now that Microsoft “Tiger” is out, what is your projection time for some early beta releases of your next project, Microsoft “Leopard”???
Monkeyboy, when you finally get your iPhone, lets have a conference call with Gates to find out when you can put this pondering, tired Microsoft idea to rest so the rest of the world can finally progress into the, what do they call it, the industrial revolution?
Did you have Monkeyboy engraved on your iPod when you bought it with Apple’s free engraving service, or did you just purchase and off the shelf stock model?
Why do all of the Microsoft European representatives use Apple Inc.’s Macintoshes during the demonstration of Microsofts new innovative products???
I heard that during the development of Vista the photocopier at your Redmond office broke. Have you had a chance to replace it yet?
Have you ever felt a sense of shame for the terrible job that you’ve done as CEO of Microsoft and have you ever considered doing the right thing for the company and the stockholders by resigning?
Do your shareholders resent your pissing away billions of dollars trying to gain control of the consumer marketplace and actually getting nowhere?
I’d ask him just one question. “Why?”