“It seems as if we can’t go two days without some ridiculous, who-cares, Apple rumor or scandal,” John C. Dvorak writes for PC Magazine. “Will someone on the Apple board do us all a favor and in Steve Jobs’ absence name Lindsey Lohan as the new Apple CEO?”
“Next week will be Apple week, and Obama and anyone else looking for the limelight should take a note,” Dvorak writes. “This would be an ideal time commit a crime, because nobody will even notice.”
“iPad II. Or will it be the iPad 2? How about the iPad Deux? This is the single most gossiped about device in history,” Dvorak writes. “I don’t care, and I even know it will have two cameras and a better screen… The motivation for having two cameras is so you can do face to face video chatting. They introduced this feature on the iPhone 4 and immediately everyone tried it out, but then never actually used the feature.”
Dvorak writes, “Whatever the case the new iPad will be a huge success and everyone who bought the first iPad will rush out to buy this one next, so they can read the newspaper on it.”
More of the same in the full article – Think Before You Click™ – here.
MacDailyNews Take: Johnny’s run completely out of material.
Poor little guy.
Little?
Bitter sack of shit that has a job that consists of reporting on things nobody cares about and bashing things they do (Apple)
Pathetic that this guy probably gets a fat paycheck while many good, talented folks are unemployed.
Life just ain’t fair, but I do like seeing him get angrier by the day.
Dvorak has actually reached the point where he is a paid technology columnist who blatantly says “Why should we care about new technology?”
once a hit whore, always a hit whore ehhh John?
‘They introduced this feature on the iPhone 4 and immediately everyone tried it out, but then never actually used the feature.”’
I am Dvorak (pronounced Dork)….I am all knowing, all seeing….
I Face Time every single day with my mother. I call her Mac from my iPhone 4 and my daughter tells grandma about her day at school as we drive home.
My wife and I used to use the iPhone version almost every day, but have cut down recently…because we use the OSX version.
Even Glenn Beck makes more sense
Even Glenn Back? Glenn exposes what you libtards are up to and you hate him for it. Shove it.
Dvorass and liberals suck!
You must be a very, very disturbed man.
But on the plus side, you like Apple.
All is forgiven, mein freund!
Yes Basil Ganglia must be very disturbed. Sad.
I think you meant, “basal ganglia.” But “Basil Ganglia” sounds like a great name for a hip Italian restaurant.
Nobody said he liked Apple.
Markus! When are you going to clean up your room?
@Markus’s Mom,
Spoken like the little communist that you are. Glen Beck for president!
That makes two who got his name wrong.
Markus and Glenn Beck are in a room alone. And in this room only one person actually believes what Glenn Beck says is true.
Keep telling yourself that macromincer. Beck speaks the truth.
Gingrich: If Palin Took Obama Actions, There Would Be Calls for Impeachment
http://www.newsmax.com/Headline/Gingrich-Obama-Constitutional-Crisis/2011/02/25/id/387455
I would be curious to know what percentage of Apple related (hated) material Dvorak spouts out from his oeuvre every year.
@Follower, it’s because Microsoft and Dell are the ones paying him. You can see why he can’t quite see the point of all this new stuff.
I think JCD will be very pleased that Lion can run Terminal in full screen mode!
Reminds me of Dana Carvey’s “Grumpy Old Man”
http://www.hulu.com/watch/4303/saturday-night-live-grumpy-old-man
Dammit, you beat me to it! 😀
“In my day, we didn’t have no ayyyye-paaads! If you wanted a tablet, you carried around a big stone! And if you wanted it to be interactive, you smashed yourself in the face with it! And that the way it was and we liked it! Now all you Apple-loving whippersnappers, get off my lawn! And let me use my MS-DOS computer! That when computers were real machines, not those candy-colored toys they make today!”
——RM
I got the first one on the first day. Later, got my wife the top end 3G iPad. Getting the iPad 2 from my son Saturday for his birthday. I will be buying the top end one and recommend he not open it and return it and hold off for the iPad 2. I will get more. 1 or 2 a year. They are great. My grand daughters love them. Maybe 2 more at Christmas too. Johnny is clueless and “completely out of material.”
MDN- STOP quoting this irrelevant asshole!
And Dvorak wrote this article on his trusty ol’ Remington manual typewriter.
Lindsey Lohan?
Put your crack pipe down Johnny D…… Step away from the car and get down on your knees. Ignoramus Maximus.
The most ignorant of pundits – led by Dvorak and Thurrott – think Apple “amazing” marketing is some kind of black magic lemming ray that makes normally rational people overpay for things they don’t want en mass.
You know what else is amazing, John? Apple’s products.
Their relentless mainstreaming of new technology, most recently ThunderBolt. Their ability to define and create markets consistently. The way you purchase media now and in the future owes a great deal to Apple’s slapping sense into the label, studio and media moguls.
Steve Jobs and Apple has done more to advance the state of the art in the 21st century than any other company in technology. Dvorak, on the other hand, is the equivalent of the old man on the porch bitching at kids to stay off his lawn. You’re irrelevant to the point of hilarity and you should thank deity every morning you’re still employed.
As always,
TheMacAdvocate
He reminds me of a guy I used to work with. He was editor of a property newspaper and every Tuesday he’d turn up at my office with his front page layout, consisting of headlines typed out on a typewriter, cut and glued, and photos cut out and glued onto the page.
This all took place in his office, where his nearly-new PC sat in the corner, switched off. “I haven’t got time to learn all this new computer stuff” was his answer when I asked him why he didn’t just type his text into an email and send it to me.
Some people will just stop learning and never adopt new technology. That’s what I think happened to John, around 1985.
I’m curious. When the guy you used to work with, the editor, when he eventually got turfed out due to technological changes, if he switched jobs and flew to Somalia to help out the pirates do up their ransom notes seeing that he was so good at typing and pasting different bits of text to a large sheet of paper.
“That’s what I think happened to John, around 1958.”
Fixed it for ya.
Even Obama makes more sense than Dvorak. On second thought, . . .
STFU. PoliTardiness NOT welcome here in any form.
Even Al Gore makes more sense than Dvorak . . . . let me retract that.
I told you to STFU
Dvorak, like micro$oft windows, have become irrelevant! And because of that, all he is capable of is calling names…
What a miserable little prick of a man. I don’t hear him complaining about daily FUD stories of Android completely taking over the mobile world in market share by 2012.
Good point. Android and Honeycomb are constantly in the press and media. Where are his complaints about that technology getting so much press and hoopla?
We have reached a point where we can’t go for a few day without hearing from Dworkduck and his cluelessness about technology.
So why should we care?
A man tired of life… who badly needs to get one.
Oh I don’t know, John’s no dummie. He just knows how to hook a rabid fanboy reader. Ya must have read it or ya wouldn’t be bitchin, right? He’s probably forgotten more about tech than most fanboys in this audience could ever know. He simply knows how to write something you can’t resist reading. Suckers! Besides, just how often do you use FaceTime? I use it some but I’ll bet that if this audience answered honestly (not a chance) it would be a minute percentage that utilize this feature! Most are too busy playing games in their mom’s basement.
John seems to spend a lot of time writing about something he doesn’t care about.
Guess what John – we don’t care that you don’t care.