“It seems as if we can’t go two days without some ridiculous, who-cares, Apple rumor or scandal,” John C. Dvorak writes for PC Magazine. “Will someone on the Apple board do us all a favor and in Steve Jobs’ absence name Lindsey Lohan as the new Apple CEO?”
“Next week will be Apple week, and Obama and anyone else looking for the limelight should take a note,” Dvorak writes. “This would be an ideal time commit a crime, because nobody will even notice.”
“iPad II. Or will it be the iPad 2? How about the iPad Deux? This is the single most gossiped about device in history,” Dvorak writes. “I don’t care, and I even know it will have two cameras and a better screen… The motivation for having two cameras is so you can do face to face video chatting. They introduced this feature on the iPhone 4 and immediately everyone tried it out, but then never actually used the feature.”
Dvorak writes, “Whatever the case the new iPad will be a huge success and everyone who bought the first iPad will rush out to buy this one next, so they can read the newspaper on it.”
More of the same in the full article – Think Before You Click™ – here.
MacDailyNews Take: Johnny’s run completely out of material.
Poor little guy.
Little?
Bitter sack of shit that has a job that consists of reporting on things nobody cares about and bashing things they do (Apple)
Pathetic that this guy probably gets a fat paycheck while many good, talented folks are unemployed.
Life just ain’t fair, but I do like seeing him get angrier by the day.
Dvorak has actually reached the point where he is a paid technology columnist who blatantly says “Why should we care about new technology?”
once a hit whore, always a hit whore ehhh John?
‘They introduced this feature on the iPhone 4 and immediately everyone tried it out, but then never actually used the feature.”’
I am Dvorak (pronounced Dork)….I am all knowing, all seeing….
I Face Time every single day with my mother. I call her Mac from my iPhone 4 and my daughter tells grandma about her day at school as we drive home.
My wife and I used to use the iPhone version almost every day, but have cut down recently…because we use the OSX version.
Even Glenn Beck makes more sense
Even Glenn Back? Glenn exposes what you libtards are up to and you hate him for it. Shove it.
Dvorass and liberals suck!
You must be a very, very disturbed man.
But on the plus side, you like Apple.
All is forgiven, mein freund!
Yes Basil Ganglia must be very disturbed. Sad.
I think you meant, “basal ganglia.” But “Basil Ganglia” sounds like a great name for a hip Italian restaurant.
Nobody said he liked Apple.
Markus! When are you going to clean up your room?
@Markus’s Mom,
Spoken like the little communist that you are. Glen Beck for president!
That makes two who got his name wrong.
Markus and Glenn Beck are in a room alone. And in this room only one person actually believes what Glenn Beck says is true.
Keep telling yourself that macromincer. Beck speaks the truth.
Gingrich: If Palin Took Obama Actions, There Would Be Calls for Impeachment
http://www.newsmax.com/Headline/Gingrich-Obama-Constitutional-Crisis/2011/02/25/id/387455
I would be curious to know what percentage of Apple related (hated) material Dvorak spouts out from his oeuvre every year.
@Follower, it’s because Microsoft and Dell are the ones paying him. You can see why he can’t quite see the point of all this new stuff.
I think JCD will be very pleased that Lion can run Terminal in full screen mode!
Reminds me of Dana Carvey’s “Grumpy Old Man”
Dammit, you beat me to it! 😀
“In my day, we didn’t have no ayyyye-paaads! If you wanted a tablet, you carried around a big stone! And if you wanted it to be interactive, you smashed yourself in the face with it! And that the way it was and we liked it! Now all you Apple-loving whippersnappers, get off my lawn! And let me use my MS-DOS computer! That when computers were real machines, not those candy-colored toys they make today!”
——RM
I got the first one on the first day. Later, got my wife the top end 3G iPad. Getting the iPad 2 from my son Saturday for his birthday. I will be buying the top end one and recommend he not open it and return it and hold off for the iPad 2. I will get more. 1 or 2 a year. They are great. My grand daughters love them. Maybe 2 more at Christmas too. Johnny is clueless and “completely out of material.”
MDN- STOP quoting this irrelevant asshole!
And Dvorak wrote this article on his trusty ol’ Remington manual typewriter.
Lindsey Lohan?
Put your crack pipe down Johnny D…… Step away from the car and get down on your knees. Ignoramus Maximus.
The most ignorant of pundits – led by Dvorak and Thurrott – think Apple “amazing” marketing is some kind of black magic lemming ray that makes normally rational people overpay for things they don’t want en mass.
You know what else is amazing, John? Apple’s products.
Their relentless mainstreaming of new technology, most recently ThunderBolt. Their ability to define and create markets consistently. The way you purchase media now and in the future owes a great deal to Apple’s slapping sense into the label, studio and media moguls.
Steve Jobs and Apple has done more to advance the state of the art in the 21st century than any other company in technology. Dvorak, on the other hand, is the equivalent of the old man on the porch bitching at kids to stay off his lawn. You’re irrelevant to the point of hilarity and you should thank deity every morning you’re still employed.
As always,
TheMacAdvocate