“Anyone listening to the tsunami of hype surrounding the launch of the iPhone would think that Apple had brought about the Second Coming,” Michael Hanlon writes for The Daily Mail.
MacDailyNews Take: We sense a bit of attitude.
Hanlon continues, “It has been so lauded that it seems Apple boss Steve Jobs has convinced everyone he actually invented the mobile phone.”
MacDailyNews Take: Do you sense it, too?
Hanlon continues, “The iPhone is the phone for the stars; Paris Hilton has apparently got one.”
MacDailyNews Take: Well, really, it was obvious from the git’s opening line.
Hanlon continues, “And now it is coming here. The God Machine, as it has become known because ‘it can do everything,’ goes on sale in Britain tomorrow from two minutes past six in the evening, precisely.”
MacDailyNews Take: Hoo boy!
Hanlon continues, “From what I have learned from the various technical reviews that have accompanied the launch of this device, the chances are that my wallet will be staying firmly closed.”
MacDailyNews Take: So, this particular Fud-spewer hasn’t even touched an iPhone. But, sure as the shit he’s slinging, that doesn’t stop him from plodding on…
Hanlon continues, “Like its cousins, the Mac computers and the ubiquitous iPod, it is a triumph of chunky sleekness.”
MacDailyNews Take: And now it’s obvious that he’s never touched a current Mac or iPod model, either.
Hanlon continues by actually writing some nice things about the iPhone (“in design terms, it is a justified hit”), but quickly recovers with, “I almost want one. But according to some specialist reviews, the iPhone isn’t quite all it is cracked up to be. For a start, it is an American mobile phone and that alone may be enough to raise suspicions.”
MacDailyNews Take: It’s Apple’s first phone. To judge the product based on where their company headquarters are located makes absolutely no sense. But, when you haven’t even touched one and you have to fill space in The Daily Mail, anything goes, it seems.
The very much non-hands-on Hanlon continues with the usual litany of talking points seemingly regurgitated from competitors’ FUD campaigns: no 3G without noting Wi-Fi, no user-replaceable battery, only 2 megapixel camera, questioning whether a single device can do multiple jobs well, blah, blah, blah.
Hanlon concludes, “Unlike everyone else in the media, I have always considered Apples to be the work of the devil, with their ‘cutesy’ styling and their bossy error messages. True, Apples are ‘cool’ and, above all, fashionable. And fashion, of course, represents the ultimate squandering of human talent. Nope, don’t think I will be getting an iPhone.”
Full article, Think Before You Click™, here.
[Thanks to MacDailyNews Reader “Mr Skills” for the heads up.]
MacDailyNews Take: It seems like we are destined to relive the various stages of the U.S. iPhone launch as each new country comes online, including tired, FUD-laden garbage from morons with massive baggage who haven’t even touched the device, much less used one enough to write about it with any shred of authority. Oh, joy.
Daily Mail Editor: