Microsoft seeks to create ‘community of governments’ to battle Windows viruses, worms, etc.

“Microsoft officials have launched a program to create a community of governments at all levels worldwide to share information and conduct joint projects on network and information technology security. The program’s goal is to more effectively handle viruses, worms and other incidents,” Brian Robinson reports for Federal Computer Week.

“‘Security Cooperation Program’ (SCP) members will have immediate access to Microsoft’s incident response center, McKee said. During an incident, they will have real-time contact with Microsoft engineers and incident response engineers,” Robinson reports. “Following an event, a feedback loop will be established to evaluate what happened, how effective the response was and what can be done to make it better the next time, McKee said.”

Full article here.

MacDailyNews Take: Governments plus Microsoft? Now there’s one nimble and quick moving partnership if there ever was one. Get Apple Macs with Mac OS X and you wouldn’t need to effectively handle viruses and worms – any “other incidents” could mostly be handled by the users themselves. But, then, of course, you wouldn’t be able to waste a bunch of time forming ineffective “communities,” staffing “incident response centers,” God-knows-what-else-horseshit-they’ll-surely-think-up, and how would the money be made if someone instituted a logical (and therefore diametrically opposed to both Microsoft and government) idea like that?

Why doesn’t Microsoft create a “community of programmers” who can build a secure new OS from scratch that doesn’t suck? Why do governments have to help Microsoft simply because they shackled themselves with the wrong choice?

An imaginary routine exchange:

Microsoft’s incident response center: “Hello, Microsoft’s Incident Response Center.”
New Jersey (USA, state, and SCP member): “All of our traffic lights are out statewide and the main computer screen is blue.”
MS: “Typical.”
NJ: “What should I do?”
MS: “Have you tried Control-Alt-Delete?”
NJ: “Yeah, nothing happens.”
MS: “Turn off the computer and go find your Windows installation CD. I’ll wait. This is going to take awhile. Hope New Jersey drivers are courteous to each other.”
NJ: “Oh yeah, Seattle-boy, this is a great time for jokes…”

25 Comments

  1. Wow, now they want the whole world to help them clean up the mess that they have made. Trouble is, I think the mess is too big even for that. I guess that is what we get for so many people choosing something that is just “good enough”

    Please please please fix the Magic Word Pop Up Problem!!

  2. “The program’s goal is to more effectively handle viruses, worms and other incidents,” Brian Robinson reports for Federal Computer Week.

    Just shut down Microsoft. That’ll take care of it. ” width=”19″ height=”19″ alt=”cheese” style=”border:0;” />

  3. JACK: Please tell us your OS, browser (include version numbers) – we cannot replicate the “Magic Word Pop Up Problem” to which you are referring. Use my email address. Thanks, MDN Webmaster

  4. A couple of thoughts:
    1 The only action I want to see from a government regarding Micro$oftopoly is an Anti-Trust Lawsuit seeking a breakup of a monopoly. They bought their way out of the US federal Suit with political contributions.

    2 Someday, an enterprising group of Lawyers should get up a Class-Action Suit against M$ for selling KNOWINGLY flawed software.

  5. Welcome to laissez-faire capitalism, Microsoft version 1.0. So, if the Redmond retards cannot build a secure OS they expect us, the taxpayers, to pick up the damage for their incompetence? Outrageous!

  6. Microsoft Security = Oxymoron

    Government Intelligence = Oxymoron, for proof of this, see above.

    Then again, RIAA was able to hijack the justice dept, the elected reps, and have even turned the FBI into their personal corporate task force, MS must have been jealous of RIAAs success. They are now trying to turn Governments of the world into their personal developers community to solve the problems that MS can’t.

    The downside? Before only our government had a back door to windows systems, now ANY goverment in the world can access any MS installed computer. MS Insecurity is going global in a HUGE way.

    MDN Magic Word = run, as in RUN AWAY!!!

  7. Is there anyone older than 2 in this world who still doesn’t think Microsoft isn’t trying to take over the world? I mean literally?

    “Oh, gee, we just can’t write a secure operating system even though we have all these billions, have all these programmers, and we’ve had all these years to do it. I guess we’ll have to get permanently connected to all the governments of the world so there’ll be one giant world government info-centre that’s, naturally, controlled by us”.

  8. I know everyone sees humor differently, but MDN, the phone exchange portion of your take is one of the funniest I’ve seen!

    MDN magic word: defense as in, New Jersey drivers better have a good defense system in place if m$ takes over their street light systems!

  9. My previous magic word was “tax”.

    With this new MS strategy, I’m afraid we are going to have to tax all Windows users to cover operational costs.

    Macs, of course, will be exempt, and eligible for a “good citizen” bonus. ” width=”19″ height=”19″ alt=”wink” style=”border:0;” />

  10. It’s really amazing especially for us here in Europe and much more in Italy where Berlusconi and his bad boys are opening all the doors to help Microsoft not only foe security issues but for million dollars contracts with pubblic companies!

    Buy LOOK at this recent news bt Dow Jones Newswire:
    LINK

  11. Am I the only one amused by the idea of Microsoft establishing a “feedback loop”? Does that mean anyone calling their help line will hear only an ear-splitting squeal?

  12. “Microsoft seeks to create ‘community of governments’ to battle Windows viruses, worms, etc.”

    in reality text

    “we can’t do security lets get someone else to do it for us”

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