Verizon Droid ad calls Apple iPhone ‘tiara-wearing digitally clueless pageant queen’ (with video)

Verizon has launched a new ad for the Motorola Droid, “Pretty.”

Electronista reports, “The new spot directly attacks the iPhone and calls Apple’s handset a ‘digitally clueless pageant queen,’ making fun of its focus on style and even mocking the glass case Apple used to display the phone at its launch in 2007.”

MacDailyNews Take: Focus on style? Just because iPhone has style, doesn’t mean that Apple focuses on it. If anything, Apple focuses on the apps available for iPhone. Something with which, along with style, the brick heavy Droid simply cannot compete.

Electronista continues, “It meanwhile thrives on the Droid’s powerful, masculine image and, among other things, suggests that the smartphone is ‘racehorse duct-taped to a Scud missile fast.'”


Direct link via YouTube here.

Full article here.

“Verizon tonight cut deep by launching a new ad for the Motorola Droid,” Electronista reports.

“The new spot directly attacks the iPhone and calls Apple’s handset a ‘digitally clueless pageant queen,’ making fun of its focus on style and even mocking the glass case Apple used to display the phone at its launch in 2007,” Electronista reports.

MacDailyNews Take: If Verizon has decided that the best way to compete with iPhone is to weakly try and fail to emasculate it, then Verizon is clueless, desperate, fearful, and stupid.

Have Small Penis Syndrome? Get a Motorola Droid from Verizon!

Besides Verizon’s and Motorola’s obvious issues, this is really a poor marketing strategy. The geniuses at Verizon are basically saying, “Hey, you 51% of the U.S. population who are female, these aren’t the Droids you’re looking for.” What’s next, Verizon, marketing Droid only to blue collar men? Way to minimize your own addressable market, dummies. By the way, you 51% of the U.S. population who are female plus all of the men who can recognize a complete platform with a vibrant ecosystem vs. yet another device fighting over Apple’s table scraps in the quest to become the SanDisk of smartphones, the iPhone 3GS is for you. The “S” is for speed.

Unless Verizon is looking to deliver highly-targeted Viagra and Enzyte ads, the only other thing we can think of is that maybe Verizon subconsciously wants Droid to fail, so they’ll be forced to finally wake up, forget about their craptastic V-Cast and dreams of other proprietary over-priced, under-featured services, and sign on Steve Jobs’ dotted line like they should have in the first place.

Apple should, and likely will, ignore these ads, since they’re not stupid like Microsoft.

And, a Scud missile is an inaccurate Soviet Cold War-era lumbering piece of junk deployed by North Korea, Syria, Sadam Hussein’s Iraq, and other tremendous examples of technologically-advanced global powerhouses. In other words, when a Scud doesn’t blow up on the pad, meander off-course, or disintegrate in flight, it’s slow. And duct-taping a 1,200 lb. horse to it certainly isn’t going to make it any faster.

106 Comments

  1. If Verizon was careful in their “There’s a map for that” ad to hit only AT&T and NOT the iPhone, it is clear that it’s no longer trying to avoid offending Apple.

    It is obvious, Verizon gave up on the idea of ever having the iPhone and had decided that Droid will have to be the closest thing to the iPhone they’ll ever get.

  2. Taking on Apple in an advertising war is more than foolish, it reeks of disparate logic . Time will tell, especially when Sprint has the iPhone and Verizon is still tied to a Scud.

    Morotola will be screwed Microsoft style when Google comes out with its own cell phone…. it’s deja vu all over again.

  3. “If Verizon has decided that the best way to compete with iPhone is to weakly try and fail to emasculate it, then Verizon is clueless, desperate, and fearful.”

    I don’t know that it is such a bad marketing ploy. It worked for SUVs in the 90’s. “Loose that sissy woman station wagon, and buy a MANS TRUCK, *to take the kids to soccer practice in…* ” It worked really well for GM and Ford for a number of years. Actually it might work very well. You would be very surprised at just how many terminally homophobic/chauvinist people there are in the US. Turn on Fox News and you will hear it preached to the choir. Homophobia is still very prominent in the US. If Verizon can connect the iPhone with femininity and or homosexuality, lots of people will drop it very quickly.

    It’s pretty dirty marketing, but it’s not stupid at all.

  4. Got to be one of the dumbest commercials I have seen in a long time. Verizon didn’t, doesn’t, and won’t have a clue. They turned down the iPhone and lost my 5 accounts. They won’t ever get me back.

  5. There are twistedly funny, quirky ads, that elict smiles while delivering a punch – and there are mean and desperate ads which inevitably backfire on the client, leaving a distaste for the product.
    Apple has thrived on the former; Verizon is hanging itself with the latter approach. I’ll live with AT&T;rather than sign on to Verizon’s macho-desperation. Image DOES matter.

  6. “Unless Verizon is looking to deliver highly-targeted Viagra and Enzyte ads, the only other thing we can think of is that maybe Verizon subconsciously wants Droid to fail, so they’ll be forced to finally wake up, forget about their craptastic V-Cast and dreams of other proprietary over-priced, under-featured services, and sign on Steve Jobs’ dotted line like they should have in the first place.”

    Another example of why I keep coming here, multiple times per day. Bravo, MDN!!!

  7. What the hell is that?? That ad lacks any class or real message. What the hell is its point? They have gone from the nerd in glasses with his team backing you up (at least those ads had a consistent message), to apparently trying to appeal to the Brazilian macho boys on South Beach. I really don’t get it!

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