“As we wait for the final outcome of the Beats-Apple situation, we might as well prepare ourselves for the best, the worst, and everything in between,” Ben Taylor writes for TIME Magazine. “Here are 9 potential endgames for the supposedly looming Apple-Beats acquisition, ordered roughly from ‘likely’ to ‘totally implausible.'”
1. Apple buys Beats, releases brand new streaming music service
2. Apple buys Beats, refreshes headphones line
3. Apple doesn’t buy Beats, everyone feels stupid
4. Apple buys Beats, realizes headphones have become a commodity market
5. Amazon swoops in, buys Beats
6. Apple buys Beats, kills Beats
7. Apple walks away from Beats deal, buys Skullcandy instead
8. Dr. Dre becomes new “Voice of Siri”
9. Apple buys Beats, Dr. Dre becomes Apple CEO
Each of the nine items above explained in the full article here.
Related articles:
Apple’s $3.2 billion Beats acquisition may not be finalized until next week – May 15, 2014
Monster CEO sounds a little bitter over Apple’s planned $3.2 billion Beats acquisition – May 14, 2014
Ben Thompson on possible Beats buy: Is Apple losing what makes Apple, Apple? – May 13, 2014
Nolan Bushnell: Beats is a ‘good deal for Apple,’ but it says Apple is ‘not an innovative tech company’ – May 13, 2014
Curated music influencing Apple’s jump into streaming – May 13, 2014
Beats Music is actually so good that I’m worried about Apple ruining it – May 13, 2014
Apple could become most powerful record label in the world with Dr Dre, Jimmy Iovine onboard – May 13, 2014
Bob Lefsetz on Apple-Beats deal: Tim Cook is an operations guy, he’s clueless, and the company has no vision</a – May 13, 2014
Apple CEO Tim Cook makes break from managerial style of Steve Jobs – May 12, 2014
Analyst Sacconaghi on Apple buying Beats: ‘We struggle with the rationale for this deal’ – May 12, 2014
Cody Willard: Apple’s Beats buy is just stupid
– May 12, 2014
Apple may unveil Jimmy Iovine, Dr. Dre executive appointments at WWDC – May 12, 2014
Apple CEO Tim Cook’s pursuit of Beats seen presaging more takeovers – May 12, 2014
Former eMusic CEO explains why Apple wants to buy Beats – May 12, 2014
Apple’s deep ties with Jimmy Iovine key driver of Beats deal – May 12, 2014
Removal of Dr. Dre video about Apple-Beats deal likely means acquisition is real and imminent – May 10, 2014
Game changer: Apple buying Beats could radically transform the digital music business – May 9, 2014
If Beats deal happens, Apple is acquiring a fad, not quality, and that is troubling – May 9, 2014
If Apple’s really buying Beats, here’s hoping it’s brilliant in a way which isn’t immediately obvious – May 9, 2014
The reason for Apple’s $3.2 billion interest in Beats? Spotify – May 9, 2014
Apple buying Beats Electronics: Its best idea since the iPad? – May 9, 2014
Why would Apple want to blow $3.2 billion on Beats Electronics? – May 8, 2014
Apple in talks to buy Beats Electronics for $3.2 billion – May 8, 2014
Apple buys beats, spins off headphones business as an IPO (sells all stocks), launches new streaming service
Read my lips 😉
Put #3 at #1 and you have a list.
I vote for number three, except there will be a few of us who don’t feel stupid.
#3.
10. Original Apple sues Beats, sounds too much like The Beatles. Dr. Dre receives honorary doctorate from Cambridge.
#9. WWDC DreNote. Thinkaboutit.
This is all rather sad or very odd. Nearly a year ago Tim said look out for new things in the pipeline throughout the year. The Apple pipeline has been only coughing up dust since then.
This beats story sounds as if Apple reached into petty cash to buy something to take people’s minds that Apple seems to be announcing vapor or phantom wear.
Apple should cancel Beats deal and buys HARmon instead
What would Apple do with Crown, DBX, JBL, AKG, Soundcraft, and other pro audio lines? Talk about a bad fit?
Oh, did you think the Harmon Group made headphones?
Actually yes they do make headphones too!!!
I like 1 and 3.
i like Skullcandy… But their better stuff, not the cheap in ears.
Point 3 or point 10.
All or nothing!
Apple buys Beats, refines streaming and headphones biz, introduces entirely new platform for signing, recording and promoting artists via the expertise of Iovine and Dre… a new kind of record label brought to you by Apple/Beats.
Beats me what is going to happen.
i like #3.
iBeat
Being incapable of generating a top 10 list is a pretty clear benchmark of the brain drain that happens when an analyst gets constipation. This of course offers the opportunity to generate a “Top 10 List of World Improvements” starting with a lovely focus on the analyst:
10. Analyshit shit themselves and discover they have shit for brains.
9. Analyshit is found to be as good on gardens as manure.
8. Manure substitute research explodes and it is discovered that analyshit and Anustralian corpses are just as good as manure.
7. Anustralians line up in hordes to contribute to maintain their number one position in the world leadershit race.
6. Terrorists sabotage Anustralian beer factories thus preventing the ability of Anustralians to reproduce.
5. Americans realizing that with the decline of Anustralians there is no one else that can make them look good decide to regain the moral high ground by acting like a civilized nation.
4. Education improves so that Anustralians learn how to get to #4 on a top ten list, which is a suggestion that Anustralians should do the world a favor and kill themselves.
3. Anustralians learning how to get to #4 on a top ten list follow the instructions by killing one of their Anussie neighbors.
2. It really doesn’t matter that Anustralians fucked up totally on a #4 top ten list, the results are essentially the same.
1. Space aliens visit Earth to promote world peace and the first act they do is remove the inhabitants of a certain putrid island in the Pacific. World rejoices.
?