Jason Schwarz: Top 10 reasons why Microsoft’s Surface is DOA

Writing for Seeking Alpha, Jason Schwarz, author of Economic Weather Station, gives his top 10 reasons why Microsoft’s Surface is Dead On Arrival:

10. The Surface is a bad laptop
09. The Surface is an inferior tablet
08. Price; good luck selling any of these things for over $499
07. Lost in a sea of Android
06. What happens when Apple releases a $249 iPad mini?
05. The future is voice, not keyboard
04. Surface is a stupid name; Apple iPad’s perfectly integrated touch iOS/iPad is actually more like a surface than the Surface
03. Memories of Zune. How can anybody trust Microsoft after the Zune fiasco?
02. Microsoft brand has lost its cool factor

MacDailyNews Take: The Microsoft brand had a cool factor?

01. Steve Ballmer: The only explanation for Ballmer still being the CEO of Microsoft is that he must have photos on Bill Gates; I can’t come up with any other rational explanation

Read more in the full article here.

MacDailyNews Take: As we wrote back on April 24, 2008:

Delusional, mouth-powered-bulb-lighting, one-lucky-dorm-assignment, coattail-riding, monkey-boy-dancing, tongue-flapping, unqualified, bad-decision-making, crazy-ass… May he stay Microsoft’s CEO for as long as it takes!

Steve Ballmer, aka Ballmer T. Clown, aka Uncle Fester

[Thanks to MacDailyNews Reader “JayinDC” for the heads up.]

Related articles:
Why I love Microsoft’s vaporware Surface tablet – June 22, 2012
Microsoft’s Surface tablet said to be Wi-Fi only at launch; no 4G, no 3G, no 2G, not even 1G – June 22, 2012
Microsoft outsources Surface assembly to Pegatron; prices above $799 for Windows 8, above $599 for Windows RT expected – June 21, 2012
Acer founder: Microsoft will quit making tablets soon – June 21, 2012
Devastating video shows Microsoft’s Surface event aping Steve Jobs’ iPad unveiling (with video) – June 20, 2012
Thanks to Apple, Microsoft is doomed in the era of mobile computing – June 20, 2012
Why wouldn’t Microsoft let anyone touch its Surface tablets’ keyboard cover? – June 20, 2012
The cost of Microsoft’s Surface tablets – June 20, 2012
Apple’s revolutionary iPad vs. Microsoft’s anti-tablet ‘Surface’ – June 20, 2012
Microsoft’s Surface tablets provokes ‘sense of betrayal’ among Windows PC assemblers – June 20, 2012
Fox News: Copier Microsoft is doomed to fail with Surface tablet – June 19, 2012
Microsoft’s Surface tablet destined to be as successful as the Zune – June 19, 2012
Surface: Why Microsoft’s big mystery turns out to be a big mistake – June 19, 2012
Microsoft’s Suicide, er… ‘Surface’ – June 19, 2012
ZDNet Sr. Tech Editor Perlow: Microsoft’s Surface has catastrophe written all over it – June 19, 2012
Microsoft previews own ‘Surface’ tablet – June 18, 2012
Microsoft touts ‘major’ June 18 event said to showcase Windows RT tablets – June 15, 2012
ZDNet’s Kingsley-Hughes: Microsoft’s Windows 8 is an awful, horrible, painful design disaster – June 8, 2012
Analyst meets with big computer maker, finds ‘general lack of enthusiasm’ for Windows 8 – June 8, 2012
Dvorak: Windows 8 an unmitigated disaster; unusable and annoying; it makes your teeth itch – June 3, 2012
The Guardian: Microsoft’s Windows 8 is confusing as hell; an appalling user experience – March 5, 2012
More good news for Apple: Microsoft previews Windows 8 (with video) – June 1, 2011

51 Comments

  1. Ballmer is the best CEO on the planet. Heck the entire Universe. Better still, best in all of the multiverse and interdimensional Fantasy/Reality everything. He need to stay forever at Microsoft!

  2. Now this is the MDN Take that I remember fondly! Great Photoshop of Uncle Fester with Ballmer and a funny Take to go with it. Just sucks that MDN just produces a few of these.:-(

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