“In the 20th century, this would have been a job for James Bond,” Ed Barnes reports for FOXNews. “The mission: Infiltrate the highly advanced, securely guarded enemy headquarters where scientists in the clutches of an evil master are secretly building a weapon that can destroy the world. Then render that weapon harmless and escape undetected.”
“But in the 21st century, Bond doesn’t get the call,” Barnes reports. “Instead, the job is handled by a suave and very sophisticated secret computer worm, a jumble of code called Stuxnet, which in the last year has not only crippled Iran’s nuclear program but has caused a major rethinking of computer security around the globe.”
Barnes reports, “Stuxnet is an incredibly advanced, undetectable computer worm that took years to construct and was designed to jump from computer to computer until it found the specific, protected control system that it aimed to destroy: Iran’s nuclear enrichment program.”
Read more in the full article here.
MacDailyNews Take: Whoda thunk it? Microsoft’s ineptitude turns out to be good for something after all! You should’ve got a Mac, Ahmadinejad, you batshit insane son-a-ma-batch.
“Here’s to the crazy ones,” indeed.
Hahahaha!
Radiation cloud-computing?
Well, whaddaya know. Finally something that Winderz is good for. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
The next question is, who else uses the same nuclear technology that Iran is using? Pakistan? North Korea? How much damage can this worm do to their systems?
Perhaps Microsoft is part of a vast government conspiracy to suck at what they do on purpose. Would explain a lot, actually.
Well, I don’t trust Microsoft for such important mission (disrupt Iran’s nuclear plans). I would rather see any country bomb their facilities.
someone should call Frederick ‘Warlock’ Kaludis. i’ll bet he wrote some of the code!
Now if we can just get bin Laden and Al Quaeda to start using Windoze Phone 7 phones…
@Frobots And do what start a nuclear war?
You can’t really hang all of this on Windows. This was more than a simple hack job. It was a very sophisticated virus that could have been engineered to infiltrate any system.
This worm spread on USB sticks and was designed to attack system with specific PLC (programable Logic Controllers). It’s not as big of a mystery as Fox is makign out to be. just clever.
You can see the FAQ here.
http://www.f-secure.com/weblog/archives/00002040.html
Shhhhhhhh, let him suffer with infected crapware.
Best mdn take ever haahaha
Stuxnet sounds so much sexier than Microsoft Bob…doesn’t it?
What?!? Of course this is Windows’ fault. They used 4 zero-day exploits!
Of course, we have little to fear regarding Iran. They are being built into the boogie man du jour by our government and the mainstream media-industrial complex, because there are people who benefit by us being at perpetual war.
Did Stuxnet really Microshaft a nuclear facility through an ‘air-wall’?
Wow.. Windoze did some good..
OMG, this virus is incredible. The sophistication of the virus is like HAL from 2001.
Also check out the wikipedia entry. Absolutely astonishing.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stuxnet
Windows in a nuclear power plant. That’s a comfort.
Are they using leal copies of Microsoft software?
As long as I know, Microsoft can’t sell to Iran.
I might be mistaken, though…..
Funniest.Thing.I’ve.Heard.Today.
bwahahahahaha
Apparently a little animated paperclip popped up and said
“It looks like you’re building a nuclear bomb.”
“Would you like help … ?”
x) Let me help you with your centrifuge speed control software.
o) Enrich uranium without my help.
o) Do not show this tip again.
I work in the chemical process industry and frankly this is no laughing matter. Stuxnet was originally designed to specifically cause malfunction of the variable-speed drives of centrifuges used to enrich uranium. Since the “vehicle” is now well known, it would be possible to retask the worm to attack Siemens-based controls systems at power plants, chemical or refining facilities, hospitals or any other site using this brand of controller. I disagree with using Windows clients as the front end for industrial controls, but unfortunately this is typical of all the major control system vendors. Even worse, most of the front ends are programmed in Visual Basic. It’s important to note that the device doing the actual control is not a Windows computer, but a dedicated process control computer running a proprietary OS. In this case Stuxnet uses the infected Windows client to access the process controller.
The real problem here is that the industrial control systems are not isolated from the “outside”, and even if there are no network connections, it’s too easy to bring in removable media (such as a CD or thumb drive) that may be infected.
His correct name is Ahmageddonjad.