Forbes: ‘Windows Vista utterly unimaginative, internally discordant and woefully out of tune’

“Windows Vista: more than five years in the making, more than 50 million lines of code. The result? A vista slightly more inspiring than the one over the town dump. The new slogan is: ‘The ‘Wow’ Starts Now,’ and Microsoft touts new features, many filched shamelessly from Apple’s Macintosh. But as with every previous version, there’s no wow here, not even in ironic quotes. Vista is at best mildly annoying and at worst makes you want to rush to Redmond, Wash. and rip somebody’s liver out,” Stephen Manes reports for Forbes.

Manes reports, “Vista is a fading theme park with a few new rides, lots of patched-up old ones and bored kids in desperate need of adult supervision running things. If I can find plenty of problems in a matter of hours, why can’t Microsoft? Most likely answer: It did–and it doesn’t care.”

Manes highlights a list of Mediocresoft’s Vista gaffes and reports, “One minor winner [is] file lists that update their contents automatically. You no longer have to hit View and Refresh to see files added since you last opened the list window. Macs, of course, have done this for years.”

“The new Mac-like ability to show thumbnails of documents and running programs is cute, but it doesn’t always work–typical of a level of fit and finish that would be unacceptable from a cut-rate tailor. Only in Windowsland will you find howlers like a Safely Remove Hardware button for memory card readers that happen to be hardwired into your computer,” Manes reports.

Manes writes, “Should you upgrade your current machine? Are you nuts? …My recommendation: Don’t even consider updating an old machine to Vista, period. And unless you absolutely must, don’t buy a new one with Vista until the inevitable Service Pack 1 (a.k.a. Festival o’ Fixes) arrives to combat horrors as yet unknown… As Bill Gates winds down his roles at Microsoft, Windows Vista may be the chief software architect’s swan song. It’s a shame his legacy is something so utterly unimaginative, internally discordant and woefully out of tune.”

Full article here.

MacDailyNews Take: We don’t know what precludes Manes from clearly stating the obvious, but we’re under no restrictions here: Obviously the proper recommendation is not to wait for some Microsoft service pack to fix what’s wrong in this XP service pack, er, Vista, but to wake up and upgrade your personal computing life to an Apple Mac – the standard to which the imitators aspire, but never even begin to approach.

On the “chrome plated turd” scale of Windows Vista reviews, Manes scores quite well with:
• A vista slightly more inspiring than the one over the town dump.
• Vista is at best mildly annoying and at worst makes you want to rush to Redmond, Wash. and rip somebody’s liver out.
• Vista is a fading theme park with a few new rides, lots of patched-up old ones and bored kids in desperate need of adult supervision running things.

In related news Steve Ballmer and Bill Gates just cancelled their subscriptions to Forbes.

Related articles:
Wow: Microsoft’s Windows Vista already hacked – February 09, 2007
Computerworld: Windows expert dumps Windows, switches to Apple’s Mac OS X – February 08, 2007
Windows sufferer spends six hours trying to ‘upgrade’ to Vista, says: ‘I should’ve bought a Mac’ – February 07, 2007
Windows Vista woes push BBC News editor to regret never having ‘defected’ to Apple Mac – February 06, 2007
Bill Gates unhinged with Apple envy; Microsoft on path to become high profile casualty – February 06, 2007
Apple takes dead aim at Microsoft’s Windows Vista in latest ‘Get a Mac’ ad (with video) – February 06, 2007
Digit: Don’t buy Vista; Microsoft may be driving millions to stick with XP or move to Apple Mac – February 05, 2007
Bill Gates has lost his mind: calls Apple liars, copiers; slams Mac OS X security vs. Windows – February 02, 2007
TIME Magazine: Microsoft’s Windows Vista ‘an embarassment to the good name of American innovation’ – February 02, 2007
Microsoft’s Windows Vista: Five years for a chrome-plated turd – January 30, 2007
Those unfamiliar with Apple’s Mac OS X may be impressed with Windows Vista – January 29, 2007
Digit: ‘Microsoft’s Windows Vista may be the best reason yet to buy an Apple Mac’ – January 29, 2007
Pioneer Press: Windows Vista shows ‘Apple is an innovation engine; Microsoft, not so much’ – January 29, 2007
Windows Vista disappoints, so get a Mac – January 29, 2007
Microsoft emails reveal serious Mac OS X Tiger envy – January 26, 2007
Analyst: Microsoft’s Windows Vista could be an opportunity for Apple – January 26, 2007
CNET Reviews Windows Vista: Is that all? Clunky and not very intuitive vs. Mac OS X; warmed-over XP – January 24, 2007
Mossberg: Microsoft’s Windows Vista offers lesser imitations of Apple’s Mac OS X features – January 18, 2007
Windows Vista disappointment drives longtime ‘Microsoft apologist’ to Apple’s Mac OS X – January 17, 2007
InformationWeek Review: Apple’s Mac OS X shines in comparison with Microsoft’s Windows Vista – January 06, 2007
NY Times’ Pogue reviews Microsoft’s Windows Vista: ‘Looks, Locks, Lacks’ – December 14, 2006
Unlike Microsoft’s Windows Vista, Apple’s Mac OS X Leopard will create no new jobs – December 12, 2006
15-year Windows vet tries Apple Mac: ‘My God! This is amazing!’ – December 04, 2006
Dave Winer: ‘Microsoft isn’t an innovator, and never was – they are always playing catch-up’ – December 01, 2006
Harvard Medical School CIO picks Mac OS X over Linux and Windows – November 30, 2006
Apple Macs can run more software than Windows PCs – October 30, 2006
Microsoft’s Windows Vista is basically Microsoft’s version of Mac OS 9.3 – October 11, 2006
Top Windows developer dumps Microsoft’s ‘pile of crap’ for Apple’s Mac OS X – September 12, 2006
$399 for Windows Vista Ultimate?! (Hint: Get a Mac) – August 29, 2006
Apple’s Mac OS X Leopard is 64-bit done right, unlike Microsoft’s Windows Vista kludge – August 14, 2006
Microsoft Windows Vista: If you can’t innovate… try to impersonate Apple’s Mac OS X – August 10, 2006
Analyst: Apple’s new Mac OS X Leopard sets new bar, leaves Microsoft’s Vista in the dust – August 08, 2006
Microsoft botches another copy job: Windows Vista Flip3D vs. Apple Mac OS X Exposé – June 26, 2006
Windows Vista rips-off Mac OS X at great hardware cost (and Apple gains in the end) – June 13, 2006
Computerworld: Microsoft Windows Vista a distant second-best to Apple Mac OS X – June 02, 2006
Dude, you got a Dell? What are you, stupid? Only Apple Macs run both Mac OS X and Windows! – April 05, 2006
Defending Windows over Mac a sign of mental illness – December 20, 2003

64 Comments

  1. THAT is the most scathing review of Vista I have ever read. My guess is that the rest of media will soon be following Forbes’ lead, except for those on Microsoft’s payroll.

    MSFT is dead meat. Millions of computer owners are in need of an upgrade. How many of them are going to say “f*ck it” and buy a Mac?

    Amswer: More than MSFT would want to admit.

    7% share by the end of 2007.

  2. Ouch!

    That is about as damning as an article can get….and yet…millions will board the VISTA bandwagon and ride it straight to hell.

    MDN Magic Word: “known” like you VISTA purchasers should have known!

  3. “Forbes: ‘Windows Vista utterly unimaginative, internally discordant and woefully out of tune’”

    But other than that it truly sucks.

    Microsoft and Windows PC Users: The world’s largest S & M party in the history of mankind.

    Welcome to the Social, indeed. (Thank you, sir! May I have another?)

  4. “Vista is a fading theme park with a few new rides, lots of patched-up old ones and bored kids in desperate need of adult supervision running things.”

    Not coincidentally, this decribes footage of the Ballmer family vacation. Ballmer in a Speedo and a big, straw hat screaming at his kids to stay away from those punks with iPods.

  5. They keep going on about 50 million lines of code. Why is MicroSoft so proud of the bloated OS they’ve created? I’d be more impressed if they only used 1 million lies of code…and actually made a secure OS.

  6. “It did–and it doesn’t care”

    Of course they don’t care, whacha gonna do, teach grandma to use Linux?

    They are a monopoly and heavily entrenched in business and live off the fear of “switching” to OSX.

    They have nothing to fear. If I were to buy an HP, would they load Ubuntu on it? Redhat? Honestly, if I were to go to BestBuy am I stuck with Windows?
    Do I have an option?

  7. WOW

    We are witnessing the beginning of the end of Microsoft.

    In boardrooms all over the USA business leaders will be forced to reappraise their dependence on Microsoft.

    When I started in the industry there was a saying “you can never be fired for choosing IBM”. For much of the last 15-20 years you could have said the same about Microsoft.

    But this no longer applies.

    IT professionals the world over will find themselves facing queries from their senior management about their reliance on Microsoft. As the bad news rolls in from Redmond, this will only intensify.

    Apple will do well from this. But in the free-for-all which will follow the end of Microsoft’s dominance of the industry, new and old players will challenge for marketshare.

    The next two quarters will confirm that the rot has set in at MS. Expect significant earnings shortfalls followed by mass departures at senior level as realisation sets in amongst those who have access to privileged information of Redmond’s problems and lack of strategic answers.

    It will happen faster than anyone imagines possible. The main reason being that the success of Microsoft relies on business confidence – Microsoft’s dominance means MS solutions are selected automatically by a conservative IT community. When confidence fails attention will be focused on the reality of MS’s products. Some are good, most are not. The result will be mass defections to alternative solutions. Once the dam wall breaks, the lake will empty in a flash.

    If I were Bill I would close the company and give the money back to the shareholders.

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