Apple’s Mac mini won’t run Disk Defragmenter, Scandisk, Norton AV, Windows Update and Ad-Aware

“Apple is a master at hype, everyone knows this.  Its founder, Steve Jobs, is well-known throughout the industry for possessing a “reality distortion field” which makes people crave Apple computers and one-button mice despite their exorbitant price and in the face of all rational logic.  Both the Apple hype machine and Jobs’ reality distortion field have kicked into overdrive this year with the recent release of the bold, innovative and affordable G4 Cube…oops I mean the Mac mini,’ Jorge Lopez writes for Divisiontwo Magazine in an article which is obviously meant to be a joke.

“I’ll admit, we were excited at first to get one in the lab to put through its paces.  I had heard about the machine and seen a few clips on G4 of Steve Jobs’ keynote at Macworld San Francisco in January.  My curiosity piqued by the pronouncement of a $499 computer from Apple, I checked out to look up its specs.  While the hardware is about roughly equivalent to a Windows PC circa 1995, what got me interested were Apple’s claims about its size, weight and footprint,” Lopez jokes.

“The Mini has got some built-in software for basic computer functions, but it can’t do many common things as well as its grown-up brothers in the Windows world can.  The little things can add up to big frustration for someone who might accidentally buy a Mini expecting it to be just like Windows.  For example, there is no Outlook Express for email, but Apple includes a program called Mail, which is like a stripped-down email client that can’t execute scripts or open attachments without user intervention,” Lopez writes. “So is the mini a maxi value?  For me, clearly, no.  When I consider that a good deal of my time is spent running applications like Disk Defragmenter, Scandisk, Norton AV, Windows Update and Ad-Aware–none of which are available for the Mac platform–it doesn’t make sense for me to “switch” to a Mac at this time.  But will Apple’s famous marketing team be able to sell the the emperor an invisible computer anyway and turn the mini into a maxi hit?  That’s the question that remains to be answered.”

Full article, funny stuff, here.


  1. Is this a joke or a real review?
    On the one hand this guy is complaining about a security measure – scripts not running automatically in Mail – and on the other hand he complains on the lack of software for restoring security breaches, like Ad-Aware and Norton.
    Remind me of this African country where people couldn’t imagine I had to pay for malaria pills in Holland.

  2. We have discussed this blog in a German Mac Forum (MacGadget) and, frankly, I suspect this guy was serious. Moronic, but seriously moronic. Even when I tried to see satiric elements I could not find them. In my view, he’s just some guy who does not know his ass from his elbow.
    But, hey, it’s a free world and even morons are entitled to their views.

  3. what gives it away as not a joke is that he graduated from devry, has an MCSE license, aparently has an IQ of 50, most likely makes about 16,000 per year, and writes for some nonsense website.

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