“In the next few weeks, Apple is expected to flick its wrist and show off a new line of wearable computers centered around a watch,” Jon Markman, investment adviser, writes for Forbes. “The hype will likely be as unbearable as the device will be unwearable.”
“‘Smart’ watches are the Afghanistan of technology. Many companies have felt they have the key to win this seemingly strategic piece of territory lying between desktop, laptop and tablet and phone, and yet all have failed,” Markman writes. “It’s no wonder, as the wrist has proven to be very inhospitable territory ruled by its own rules of culture and habit. Every smartwatch so far has proven to be a really dumb gambit for reasons that are so simple they seems to be beyond the reach of the geniuses who run tech companies.”
“Most people don’t want a health monitor on their wrist. They already know they are out of shape, have high blood pressure and have erratic heartbeats. They don’t need to be reminded of that every time they look at their hands, and they certainly don’t need some bratty engineers in Silicon Valley who live on Red Bull and instant coffee to shame them into adopting better habits,” Markman writes. “The smartwatch is a solution in search of a problem. Tech companies like Apple want to sell them because they have run out of other ways to sell you their schlock, but that does not mean there will ever be a mass-market demand for them. I have a feeling I will still be writing about the smartwatch frontier ten years from now, when Apple releases v5.0 and swears they will get it right this time after repeated flops on the wrist.”
Read more in the full article here.
MacDailyNews Take: iCal’ed for future use.
BTW, what’s stupider than proclaiming an Apple product a “flop” that you’ve haven’t yet seen?
So far, iWatch is a magnet for idiots.
Related articles:
Jean-Louis Gassée: iWatch won’t sell in numbers, dollar volume, or profit comparable to iPhone or iPad – June 23, 2014
TheStreet’s Rocco Pendola: Apple’s iWatch will fail – June 23, 2014
Analyst: Apple to sell ‘iWatch’ to at least 10% of existing iPhone users next year – June 13, 2014
UBS sees Apple selling 21 million $300 ‘iWatch’ units in first year – June 9, 2014
Jon Markman will be “flopping” like a fish gasping for credibility air. They never learn.
Jon Markman is a shlock!
He used a word without realising that the word describes him to a T.
I didn’t read the article much past the first paragraph. iWatch speculation is the Afghanistan of journalism. Investor advisers keep trying to write articles like this and they all have failed.
Dvorak should sue Markman for plagiarism.
Haha! While reading the article I was telling myself that this sounds an awful lot like John.
Been there. Done that. My drawer is full of sleep monitors, heart rate monitors, oxygen monitors, blood pressure monitors, temperature monitors…. BUT I WILL BE AMONG FIRST IN LINE FOR AN IWATCH!
Start a new fad and wear them all at the same time.
Why would you buy so many? That’s just stupid.
‘Cause he wants to live!
I’m completely amazed at the stupidity of investors. Apple has not even announced such a product even exists and yet this dumb idiot is already claiming that it will be a failure.
How can you make up such stupidity? He has no real specs, no product to test, no software to run. So how can something that does not exist fail? Just don’t understand making up stuff and then calling it a failure on Apple’s part.
History suggests that the Apple naysayers will get it wrong; probably very wrong. But history also suggests that no matter how wrong the are, these “investment advisers” will keep their jobs and inflated salaries no matter how wrong they are.
In a nation ruled by the dollar, and where corruption is insidious, this is to be expected: every aspect of politics and business is corrupted from redistricting to the stacking of the courts and the creation of wars. Nothing in the US works as designed any more – money rules all.
In this ocean of chaos Apple stands virtually alone as a beacon of excellence: it is only natural that those who dwell in the dark fringes of the money world never tire of trying to shoot Apple down.
Plus ća change…
I stopped wearing a watch 20 years ago. With cell phones and clocks everywhere, wearing a watch just seemed redundant. However, a smart watch with health sensors, now that is a different matter. I believe I’d fork out the money for one of those if it was designed well and did lots of cool stuff.
One hope I cling to is that the iWatch will have an idiot sensor. If I know I’m approaching an doofus ahead of time, I can avoid them and therefore keep my blood pressure under control.
We call those “analyst sensors.”
And beware the “Dope-eller Effect:” The tendency for stupid ideas to begin making sense the faster they come at you.
Apple isn’t going to release a watch. They know people use their phone to find out the time… ;)))
Yeah. Flop like iPad, right. I’ll get one. Or two (for my wife). Or four (for our kids). What if it gives me GPS knowledge about my family members whereabouts? Yeah. Flop, flop, flop, flop. I’ll take four.
Also idiotic are the constant artist renderings and rumors used as hit bait for tech junkies with no critical thinking skills. When Apple releases a product, only then will I comment.
Obviously, you already have…
Liberal speak. Makes no sense.
Low IQ alert.
All this talk of watches being obsolete! I am a techy person, with lots of gadgets, and I have 8 watches. I do not wear them all at once, but I will admit to a passion for timepieces. I have a wonderful ship’s bell that is 100% mechanical that chimes the bells of the watch, and have an app that does the same thing for me on my iMac and my iPhone. I will wait to see what, and if, Apple produces in a watch, before I run my yap on what is wrong or right about the idea!
“Tech companies like Apple want to sell them because they have run out of other ways to sell you their schlock”
Shlock! F*ck you man!
“Apple want to sell them because they have run out of other ways to sell you their schlock”
Really? Care to list a piece of “schlock” Apple sells?
“BTW, what’s stupider than proclaiming an Apple product a “flop” that you’ve haven’t yet seen?”
Answer — calling Apple products schlock.
Send him a case of Samsung schlock. He deserves it.
“Most people don’t want a health monitor on their wrist.”
In the United States approximately 100 million people go on diets every year. In 2010 $61 billion was spent on weight loss. And then there is the countless millions more that want to stay healthy. Extrapolate this out to the rest of the world. So, it might be true that the author’s fat ass, Twinkie scarfing, one foot in the grave wife might not want a device which helps her stay on a diet, but for the millions that want to live healthy the iWatch will be an invaluable tool.
“Duh-uh, slobber, duh, slurp drool, duh-uh-uh, drool, slobber, duh.”
-Jon Markman
First the thingy in the ear – now the thingy on the wrist – SAD.
> Every smartwatch so far has proven to be a really dumb gambit for reasons that are so simple they seems to be beyond the reach of the geniuses who run tech companies
This is a good one… Every major Apple innovation (Mac, iPod, iTunes Music Store, iPhone, iPad, etc.) has been a “gambit,” that becomes “obvious” to everyone, but only AFTER Apple does it first. After the Mac, (eventually) every personal computer was a Mac or a copy of a Mac. Every smartphone is now an iPhone or a copy of an iPhone.
So that statement is actually somewhat true, for every tech company that is not Apple. Apple has a LONG track record for showing the world something that IS “so simple,” and yet “beyond the reach of the geniuses who run tech companies” (not called Apple).
This is because only Apple is truly innovative, with the courage to take that “gambit.” Other tech companies typically take something that is currently successful, and “morph” it into something else. That’s their take on “innovation.” For example, smartphones before iPhone were downscaled PCs, with a tiny physical keyboard and a stylus for pointing instead of a mouse. Then came iPhone, and after iPhone’s huge success, every recent “smart watch” product has been an attempt to morph an iPhone to fit the wrist. Apple will do something different and new.
I’m sitting at a cute little restaurant around the corner from my office waiting for my wife. (Nice working five blocks from home…)
Anyway, looking around there are 25 diners and six staff. Out of those, two men and one woman are wearing a watch. I haven’t worn one in ten years.
Oh, family of seven just walked in. One more watch.
I have no idea how the iwatch will do on the market, but in order to be any kind of success apple will have to get people to start wearing something that is presently a breath away from being an anachronism.
Well said.
But if any company has a snowball chance in Hell, Apple WILL do it better than anyone out there.
That said, the author raises valuable concerns. With the U.S. now recording a record obesity rate while consuming alcohol, pot, cigarettes and fried food in higher volumes — who wants the country nanny wrist doctor to remind them daily?
It will be an interesting sales demographic chart for sure … TIME will tell.
But you are counting devices that have one function – telling time. IF Apple produces an “iWatch” it will do much, much more – and probably do some things that none of us have even imagined.
In 2006 I had no clue that in 2014 I would have a device (iPhone) that would become so much a part of my daily routine that it would now be difficult to adjust to life without it.
Perhaps the “iWatch”, if there is to be one, will follow a similar trajectory?
Consider the source: Markman is a stock options player and tout. He has a service that he hypes to sell options recommendations to speculative investors and options players. My hunch is that this is nothing more than trying to short Appjr stock. And the favored technique of shorts is to use FUD articles like the one above.
Don’t be surprised if Markman changes sides when it’s in his interest to do so.
FUD (O_o) FUD (o_O) FUD (O_o) FUD (0_0)
Asinine.
Never announced.
Never seen.
No data.
Just rumors.
iWatch is DOOOOOOMED!!!!!
So typical.
So predictable.
So unworthy of Forbes.
Get bent Jon Markman, investment adviser, who writes for Forbes. BlahBlahBlah… paycheck. “I have a feeling”… paycheck. Is this your idea of journalism?
I doubt if this person has achieved intellectual or academic excellence!
People who critique the iWatch and iHealth don’t get the bigger picture. Health monitoring will become big business. Think about this. You are overweight and you go to an insurance company for Life or Income protection. Health monitoring allows them to assess longevity and they will give you a lower premium cover. This will be big business work it out.
This nailed it for me: “The hype will likely be as unbearable as the device will be unwearable.”
Good line, indeed.
“what’s stupider than proclaiming an Apple product a “flop” that you’ve haven’t yet seen?”
Being able to “see” it never seemed to help John C. Dvorak.
Watch: A timepiece that could offer style.
Cell Phone: A communication device that could tell time and offer style.
Smart Phone: A link to the connected world that can communicate, tell time and offer style.
Smart Watch: A timepiece that can interact with your smart phone bi-directionally, convey biometric information, tell time and offer style.
Notice how things have progressed? Retain the old “features” and add new ones.