Dr. Emilio Bombay writes a column for The Star-Telegram called, “Dr. Bombay Computer M.D.” that is an oftentimes humorous takeoff of advice columns. Dr. Bombay specializes in berating his questioners. Often, the questions themselves turn out to hold the answers, while Dr. Bombay’s responses provide other insights by highlighting stereotypes, sort of Archie Bunker-style. We thought you’d like to read a particular question and Dr. Bombay’s answer from his column, dated today.

Dear Dr. Bombay: I remember the fun we had doing design work on the Macintosh while the DOS and Windows guys were still trying to determine whether to right-click, left-click or go get a cup of coffee. Now my eMac does my genealogy, bank account, bill paying, shopping, research, snapshot filing and correspondence. It seems to me that a real computer-assistance column would help users in doing these things instead of having to continually tell them how to get rid of pop-up ads and strange viruses.
— Mac Daddy

Dear Daddy: Well, yeah, but this isn’t a real computer-assistance column. Haven’t you figured that out? And why waste valuable time and space writing about Macs? They account for only a minuscule share of the computer market. Even industry analysts who aren’t shills or just plain drunk are saying that Linux-based systems are right on Apple’s heels and will probably pull ahead next year. Can the Commodore 64 be far behind? In this economy, when somebody who refuses to use Windows can drop two grand on a new Mac or buy a Linux box and a giant bag of Chee-tos for less than 300 bucks at Wal-Mart, which way do you think those market-share numbers are headed?

Dr. Bombay’s column can be read here.